The Mini-Retirement Misconception

89 Comments

Photo by Tina Su

When I first learned of the mini-retirement concept, I was immediately attracted to the idea. To me it represented freedom. I had all these romantic notions associated with it, and when I found a way to take three months off from work, I jumped at the first chance and ran with it.

While traveling is an eye-opening experience and a chance to see how others live in vastly different cultures. It is exhausting, on many levels. It quickly became clear to me that the romantic concept of traveling is flawed.

I often ask people: if you had all the money in the world, what would you be doing? The most popular answer is: to quit my job and start Traveling. There’s nothing wrong with this answer, I too have given it many times. However, in this answer, we include the notion of escaping our current realities while longing for something else in its place. And when we actually get to that place which we’ve longed for, disappointments sets in, for it did not meet the expectations conjured by our imagination.

My Personal Story

We left for India three months ago, mesmerized with the ideas of peace and spiritual growth, of ancient cultures and creative stimulation. After we landed, our happy thoughts quickly subsided when we were confronted with culture shock, poverty, pollution, chaos, and haggling (of course, we got the first list as well, but the peace came to us much later). Soon, thoughts of home, family and the usual comforts we took for granted became a regular mantra, and became the focus of our longing. I’m not going to lie, traveling in India as a foreigner was hard. In fact, traveling anywhere foreign for more than a month is hard.

Prior to leaving, I had longed for the freedom to travel. I was tired of my daily routines at the office, I wanted to get away. For years, thoughts of traveling became a kind of escapism and added spices of hope to my work routine which I was quickly losing interest in.

Within a few weeks on the trip, the excitement of exploring new destinations became a routine. Each day, we lined up along the hundreds of other tourists visiting must-see places, walked along souvenir sellers using the same sales tactics, haggled with taxi drivers, and ate the same food offered in all the restaurants catered to travelers. I’m being sarcastic here, but the message is clear: I’ve traded one routine for another. Except now, I longed for something different.

After six weeks of traveling, I was starting to get bored. Sightseeing got old really fast, and I didn’t want to visit another fort or palace again. After eight weeks of floating around without real responsibilities, I was anxious to come home and be productive again.

Despite the amazing things I saw and the heart-warming people I met on the trip, I was excited and ready to jump back into my old reality, again. I couldn’t wait to get home!

The Lessons

While traveling can enrich your life experience and enhance your understandings of other cultures, it will not make you happier and cannot be the solution to your discontentment at home. I’ve learned that, at the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter what I’m doing, as long as I am being productive and contributing towards a greater cause other than myself. Regardless of what I’m doing, true happiness can only be found right now!

Other lessons I’ve learned:

Our Mind Likes Problems - Because I didn’t have much responsibilities or commitments while I was traveling, my mind was quite unoccupied of problems and conflicts, thus gaining more clarity with my inner thoughts. With my new found mental space and clarity, I noticed that my mind would try to create conflicts in order to fill this extra space; as a result, to disturb the new found peace. My mind would pick up all the little annoyances from around me and try to snowball them into what seemed like life threatening issues to shakeup the inner stillness.
Don’t Take Things for Granted - During our trip, we realized how little we actually appreciated our everyday conveniences, until we no longer had them. Things like: hot shower, 24hr electricity, running water, a clean toilet which doesn’t leak, restaurants serving consistent meals, pleasant customer service when things go wrong, the availability of lettuce in a grocery store. When we landed in Heathrow airport on our return flight, I was shocked and grateful to find the bathrooms with toilet paper. I now give thankful thoughts to every little thing that contributes towards my comfort and wellbeing. Simple things like having running water, supple food, and my comfortable home.
We Need Very Little - After traveling in one bag for several months, it became clear how little we actually need in order to be happy. After coming home to the rest of my stuff, they felt like heavy burdens which weighed on my soul.
Happiness Is Here, Now - Regardless of what we’re doing, we can find happiness in this moment. The problem is, we often do not seek happiness in this moment, and then become consumed with reasons why we should escape this moment. Instead of focusing on why you’re not happy, ask yourself: what can I gain from this moment? What can I learn? What good can be drawn from this situation? Where is the goodness, where is the beauty?
Purpose & Meaning - Once the essentials in our lives are fulfilled, we need purpose and meaning. I learned that feeling productive and working towards a purpose is important to me. Extended periods of doing nothing will result in boredom.
Slow Down - It’s amazing how rushed we become as we move through our hectic schedules, running from one task to the next, and packing our calendars with more commitments than we can handle. Many people I encountered in the extreme north and south of India, lived with such simplicity, clarity and calmness, yet they are some of the happiest people I’ve met. They carried an unspoken grace with them, and smiled cheerfully at anyone. I can just imagine now, as we go to bed after an exhausting and full day of running around, the rest of the world is starting a new day: Mr. Nawang in Ladakh is tending to his apricot trees and making breakfast for his guests with a large smile. Mr. Thomas in Alleypy is sitting along the Kerala backwaters to enjoy the sun rise and waving at families passing by in bamboo boats on their way to the morning market.

Tips for Your Mini-Retirements

No Expectations - Things never turn out the way we expect, and pre-determined expectations can decrease our joy while we’re in the moment of truth. I can only tell you that, during our trip, expectations have only lead to disappointments. While it’s hard not to have any expectations, try to minimize them by wearing an open mind and a positive outlook to welcome new experiences. Instead of being disappointed from failed expectations, focus on the lessons learned that contributed to you as a person. Focus on things you enjoyed. Focus on the gains.
Take Your Time - Don’t try to see everything on one trip. Otherwise, you’ll get burnt out really fast and will start to resent your trip. Aim to see less number of cities and spend more time in each. I recommend, no less than a week in each new city.
But, Not Too Much Time - As I’ve mentioned, we got bored after week six. By week ten, we couldn’t wait to get home. While there were many amazing things still left to see, we missed the simple conveniences of home. Of course, everyone is different, but if you’re like us, we don’t recommend going for more than 6-8 weeks, unless you had other purposes and plans.
Vacation At Home - Just because we have vacation time, doesn’t mean that we need to travel somewhere far. After feeling exhausted from our trip, we’ve taken a special fondness towards the concept of vacationing at home. There are so many relaxing things you can do: get on a healthy exercise and diet routine, work on a home project, get organized again, spend days in a comfortable chair curled up with some good books, do a movie marathon with your loved ones. What sounds good to your soul?
Have a Purpose on the Trip - Instead of traveling as just a sightseeing tourist, consider staying in one place for an extended period of time to work on a personal or social project. This will add more meaning to your trip, and will give you the opportunity to get to know an area and culture beyond the tourist destinations. Some ideas: volunteering to teach at monasteries and schools, volunteering at a charity, take a meditation or yoga class, take a cooking or language or dance class, start a personal art project.
Daily Gratitude - At the end of the day, make sure to list out the things you are grateful for that day. You can do so by whispering out aloud with closed eyes and a smile just before bed. Traveling can be challenging for the body and mind, and it’s easy to get caught up in the negative and unpleasant events that occurred during the day. Practicing gratitude will help you maintain a positive outlook and to focus on things that you’ve enjoyed.
Prepare for Difficulties - Know ahead of the time that you may encounter difficult situations and people. Prepare your mind for such thing by reminding yourself that this is the perfect opportunity to practice acceptance and understanding.
Don’t Plan Everything - Have a rough idea of what you want to do and see, but don’t tightly pack everything to a schedule. Leave some room to adjust the sail, based on the wind conditions of your trip. For example, when we left, we only had our flight tickets to Delhi and one other flight booked to our second city. We eventually booked nine other flights while we were traveling. This gave us tremendous flexibility and a sense of exploration.
Do Budget - Prior to leaving, plan how much you’d like to spend in total, and then only leave that much in your checking account. Budget major categories such as transportation costs, hotels and other spending. We did this roughly but did not follow-through to re-evaluate our budget during the trip. As a result, we ended up spending much more money than planned. Remember this: it doesn’t matter how cheap things cost, they can add up very quickly into a large number.
Smile - Smile often and do so authentically, even to those who has ripped us off. It’s much more attractive and better for our health than feeling bitter about it. Laugh it off!

Parting Words

In the end, our three months trip was a tremendous learning experience about ourselves and in coping with extreme circumstances, both positive and not so positive.

I’m still a fan of the mini-retirement concept, except I now have a better understanding of what it means to have a lot of idle time and its challenges. Next time we have a mini-retirement, we’ll be spending a third of that time vacationing at home. Oh Yeah!

The point of this article was not to advocate that traveling is bad, but rather that it is a learning experience with its own set of challenges. It’s not all perfection, as created by our perception. Our perception is interested in creating distractions to escape this moment. Lots of people set the idea of traveling on a pedestal (especially authors and media), but in doing so, we treat the present moment as a mere means to an end, and forget that happiness can only be found in the Now.

It’s important to have dreams and goals, but don’t forget to experience joy, Now. In between striving towards our dreams, remind ourselves to step back and see what we can do to find joy in what we’re doing, regardless of what we’re doing, right now.

Open Question to the Audience:

If you had all the money in the world, what would you be doing?
Share your answers in the comments. I can’t wait to read them. Thanks for sharing, my friend. :)

If you enjoyed this article, please vote for it on Digg, share it on StumbleUpon or bookmark it on del.icio.us. I appreciate your support. :)

Other Articles You May Like:

External Resources on Lifestyle Design and Travels:

4HWW: Low-Cost, High-Reward Mini-Retirements
The Life Less Traveled: A Couple Cycling Around the World
Location Independent Professional: Enjoying the Here and Now
Book: The 4-Hour Workweek

89 Responses (87 Comments, 2 Trackbacks ):

Comments

Gregg S
May 14 08, 4:49 pm PDT

1
Wise words.

Thank you for sharing.
Anna

May 14 08, 5:19 pm PDT

2
I appreciate your wise words on the level of hope we place in traveling abroad. The promise of excitement and adventure can outweigh a realistic conception of what traveling abroad is like - especially on a limited budget. I went to Peru last summer for a month and loved it, but I was also homesick and was very happy to get back to my normal routines. I had dreamed of traveling overseas all my life, and while in some ways it fulfilled my expectations, in other ways it was nothing like I had imagined. Having realistic expectations is so important, as is being content wherever you are - just as you said.
Adam

May 14 08, 5:30 pm PDT

3
If I had all the money in the world, I would be bringing together the amazing people I know to build a business to serve the changing needs of society. That is my way of contributing back to the world and finding meaning in my life. Only through trial, change, learning and building can I really understand who I am.
Devan
May 14 08, 5:33 pm PDT

4
Good article Tina! Having gone through the process recently of being more grateful for what I have, I can wholeheartedly agree that true happiness comes from living NOW, rather than hoping for changes in the future.

Rather than constantly wishing for a holiday or a change (in the past), I can now sit back in my hammock and enjoy the songs of the birds in the trees. A simple task like sweeping the leaves off the driveway with mindfulness is a chance to leave the hustle and bustle of work behind.

Happiness is truly where the home and family is. I look forward to travelling more and discovering more of this exciting world we live in, but I am also glad that I have a great family and a place we can all call home.
Pete Forde

May 14 08, 5:46 pm PDT

5
Thanks so much for this, Tina.

My favourite of your articles, yet!
Andre Hess|Empowered Soul

May 14 08, 5:50 pm PDT

6
Great article, Tina! I’m a natural homebody, and I traveled all over the world as a child, so the idea of a traveling mini-retirement never seemed all that attractive to me! I’m glad you’re bringing up the concept of a vacation at home. Those are my favorite kind!

But honestly, if I had all the money in the world I think I would still be doing what I’m doing now - writing and working with clients and creating tools that help people with developing their intuition and connecting to their Higher Self. I might offer retreat programs for those who can’t afford them … but in essence, I’d still be doing all the same things! :-)

Isn’t that what it’s about - finding work that’s so fulfilling we don’t want to retire - ever?
Shilpan | successsoul.com

May 14 08, 5:55 pm PDT

7
Tina,

Thank you for reminding that to live life, we don’t need a whole lot. It’s all in our mind. We can enjoy vacation at this moment at the place we are with mindfulness. I’ve been raised in India and I can relate to the points you are making about people. I advice all of my friends here in USA to visit east to feel gratitude about what they have. Excellent post as always. You’re the best.

Shilpan
John Rocheleau

May 14 08, 5:57 pm PDT

8
Tina,

I totally hear what you are saying. I have found that traveling is best done as simple as possible. That means the usual tourist spots are not on the list for us.

The absolute best way to be immersed in another culture is to live and work there. You experience the real deal then. It is more difficult to arrange though.

Your experience on this trip will serve you well, perhaps in surprising ways.

Cheers,
John
Gamy Rachel

May 14 08, 6:18 pm PDT

9
Hey welcome back Tina, miss having you around :)

I like your wisdom and insights about life purpose always.
Thanks for being who you are and being true to yourself and
others.

Love,
Gamy
Monica

May 14 08, 6:32 pm PDT

10
Thanks for sharing your experience with us Tina!

I have always been a big fan of traveling. You are absolutely right that no matter where you are, the rewards in life are in the present moment.

Funny that many of the times I “want to get away” and go for a trip, are also the times when I am most disconnected with NOW.

Love your honesty and hearing what you have to say!
Darryl Heron

May 14 08, 6:59 pm PDT

11
Tina:

I can’t believe that you’re trip is over. When I first read about your trip I was so excited for you and thought that it was an incredible opportunity. Welcome back.

Darryl Heron
JEMi | Tips for Life, Love, You

May 14 08, 8:58 pm PDT

12
Hmm.. with all the money in the world - honestly - I’d build this building I dreamed up as a little girl which is now forming into something with a lot more detail as a young adult. A place of wellness, therapy, counseling.. and a couple of getaways. :)

This was a fascinating read for me because I too am a natural homebody (Andrea Hess mentioned this in her comment) and so if I were to choose to go away to someplace completely different, it wouldn’t be for so long. So I admired you for getting up and going with such a strong sense of adventure.

You did learn alot and that photo is beautiful. Tina- thanks for sharing
Shun Jian | RichGrad.com

May 14 08, 9:58 pm PDT

13
Truly awesome lessons you have learned from your trip…

On the part where you mentioned that “Our Minds Like Problems”… I would prefer to reframe it as “Our Minds like to be kept occupied”. It relates to the human need of feeling significant… If our mind is not thinking about something, it feels uncomfortable… and it seems that it’s not contributing…

Well at least that’s how I choose to see it =)
Chris Sharp
May 14 08, 11:01 pm PDT

14
Tina. The insights you have just shared can really help people look for presence in the now, the joy it is just to feel into this moment. Like you mentioned, you can feel gratitude for the experiences you have daily. It’s a good attitude no matter where you are, I feel.
It’s true that many people put the idea, “what’s next?”, into their minds and completely miss THIS moment. I feel that has been the case for nearly every vacation I’ve ever been on. A stillness though created deliberately inside, feeling appreciation for the moment can bring more calm, joy, or excitment than any ‘place’ we think we’ll find it at.

Anyway to answer the question: What I would be doing is helping on a broader scale, to connect people back to themselves and to others, and to help evolve the consciousness of the planet. I would only be responsible for the money I feel I could be responsible with. Others are geniuses at using money, and can envision for the long-term how the money can best be used. I would entrust to others to do their own magic to use the money for the highest good and intentions, and succeed.
Hemant
May 14 08, 11:19 pm PDT

15
I just got asked that question this weekend. My answer? I’d be doing exactly what I’m doing now. Working on reporterist.com to try to make the world a better place. I swear that’s not a shameless plug. Maybe I’d take my wife on a few more vacations if I had a little more money ;)
Adrian McEwen

May 15 08, 12:01 am PDT

16
I must admit I never really saw the appeal of travelling - I enjoy visiting new places, but it’s never been among my top priorities of things to do.

However, my girlfriend wanted to become fluent in the language and so we’re nearing a year abroad living in Italy. It hasn’t always been easy, but I’ve loved it. I think you’re right to recommend staying longer and getting more of a feel for the place - it’s such a different experience to rushing round trying to tick off all the sights you’re supposed to see.

And if I had all the money in the world?

I’d be doing what I’m doing now, just getting there faster. Trying to build things to make peoples lives better and make the world a bit greener.
SpecialPete

May 15 08, 12:28 am PDT

17
Thanks for a great article Tina. It has helped me put some things in perspective. I am start my own mini-retirement in 1 week and will be taking 3 months off between emigrating from England To Australia. I am in the final planning stages now so your article could not have come at a better time.
Matt

May 15 08, 1:08 am PDT

18
Hey Tina,
Great story of traveling, that is almost the news I don’t want to hear! Do you think with a higher budget or staying longer at each destination would help ease the stress of the journey?

I’m traveling europe this summer for a few weeks, I’m glad I read this before leaving!

Matt

**************************
REPLY:

Thanks Matt! Having a higher budget may make things more comfortable in terms of hotels and such, but will not make you miss home or feel that traveling isn’t all you’ve hoped it would be. Also, stress related to traveling depends on where you go, Europe is a pretty gentle place and you won’t experience stark cultural contrast as in Asia. I did the Europe thing just after collage and experienced similar feelings of it being long. But do it! It’ll change your life.

Tina
m_s
May 15 08, 1:13 am PDT

19
Great post - thanks! I’ve travelled extensively in India, and always found it the hardest place to be. I’ve not been in all the touristy places, but always in little villages and slums. All the familiar western romantic ideas tend to die a hard death within a few days. Of course, with a country that big and with such extremes of wealth, there are many, many Indias, and some will have had completely different experiences to you and me. My travel companion, who has spent 6 months of every year since 1983 in India, has three rules he offers for travelling in India:

1) No generalisations about India hold.
2) Nothing will go exactly to plan.
3) Everything will work out in the end.

And that has been my experience! Nothing ever ran quite to plan, but everything turned out well in the end…

Welcome back - it’s good to see the blog waking up again.
Stephen Hopson

May 15 08, 1:33 am PDT

20
Tina:

Welcome back! Good report on your mini-retirement vacation experience. It’s very similiar to my one week trip to Chicago last week. After just one week, I was looking forward to coming home! That pales in comparison to your trip to India!

I agree that if you have all the money in the world and you want to travel, it should be kept to a maximum of 6 to 8 weeks with a “go with the flow” kind of mentality.

Finally, if a person has problems at home, he or she will take them along on a trip. Escaping to another country won’t necessarily make a person’s inner turmoil disappear. Might as well work on them BEFORE going on a trip. That’s what I got from reading this article. Nice job.
Dan

May 15 08, 2:33 am PDT

21
Well said, Tina. I’m always amazed at how exciting it is to leave, and then how exciting it is to come home, and then how exciting it is to leave, and then…

Regardless,though, it seems like whether it’s a week or a year, I’m always ready to come home when the time runs out.

Love the question. All the money in the world? I’d do exactly what I do now, but I might vary the pace at times, have more help, or do things on a larger scale. It’s a question I ask myself a lot to make sure things are on the rails.
@Stephen

May 15 08, 3:47 am PDT

22
Welcome back Tina! This is a super article and I am looking forward to learning more and more from you.
Nathalie Lussier

May 15 08, 4:12 am PDT

23
Awesome post, which really gave me some things to think about before I set off to China for 3 months. I will be staying at my boyfriend’s grand parents’ place and so I think that the meeting of family should help ground me and help me feel more welcome, at least for part of the trip. I was also considering teaching English on the side while in one specific city. I think that would be an interesting experience.

Answer to your question: I would start a not-for-profit organization to bring awareness to the emerging ways of life today. I would use this organization to bring education to those who cannot have it and to coach people into taking back their innate power. Plus I would donate a lot of it to the Fruit Tree Planting Foundation and Equality Now.
Darrell Simpson

May 15 08, 4:16 am PDT

24
Hello Tina

Thanks for the reply and offer of help, When relating to the business world, I see the next step in relating your thoughts to business. We all know about pre-determined expectations. This is counting your chickens before the eggs hatch, many times in business we expect the best to happen, then we find for one reason or another that the other party has destroyed your world by not living up to what was expected.

All the things you touched on are of the utmost importance in business also, as I’ve been in business for myself since the age of 18 and being self taught, I’ve had to learn many of the important facts the hard way.
So the readers in business I’m sure can relate to what I’m saying.

Dealing with International and Domestic markets, I’ve seen real business, Real Good Business and Real Bad Business, Business in the real world I call it, It’s sometimes sad of the lessons we have to learn when dealing with others, that’s why we should never be afraid to ask for help, My advice is Never Never be afraid to ask another person for help, does it make you humble (YES) but being humble is one of the keys to success.

Anytime I can help another person I always do. This will give you Gratitude to no end, then you touch on preparing for Difficulties, (everyday Business) hearing this come from a lady of such young age tells me that you have been taught very well, you must of had a great Mom and Dad.Great Job

Anyway I wanted to write a few words in reference to this blog and I wish you all the best, If we can ever help in any way please let us know, anyone that would like advice I’ll always offer what I’ve stored in the cell locker to you.

To your next or 1st Million I know your going there.

Darrell
Nairobian Perspective

May 15 08, 4:45 am PDT

25
Very interesting post, how lttle we value the precious things we have until we loose them.Your blog is insightful, Keep it up
Greg
May 15 08, 4:55 am PDT

26
the moment I let go of it was the moment
I got more than I could handle
the moment I jumped off of it
was the moment I touched down

how bout no longer being masochistic
how bout remembering your divinity
how bout unabashedly bawling your eyes out
how bout not equating death with stopping

thank you india
thank you providence
thank you disillusionment
thank you nothingness
thank you clarity
thank you thank you silence

- alanis morissette - thank u

This song seems to fit your experiences.
Lexi of Creative Energies

May 15 08, 5:01 am PDT

27
Life is full of surprises, and some of them are fun. Others are simply, well, surprising, when things do not turn out as expected.

I like the way you evaluate what works for you and what does not work for you.

Lexi
Zath

May 15 08, 5:07 am PDT

28
A really interesting and refreshing perspective on travelling and taking time out - I’ve always thought I may find travelling would become a routine eventually - I’ve not been yet, but am certainly bearing that in mind.

I can imagine that it really does make you appreciate what you do have in the here and now and the benefits of living in our society as opposed to only seeing the negatives.

If I had that much money I didn’t need to work - I’d see the world a bit, maybe build my dream house, but then I’d have to have a business or some project to occupy me - eventually then doing charitable work of some kind that would give back to society that I’d prospered in.
Cynthia

May 15 08, 5:22 am PDT

29
I think I would buy myself a place that was only mine. Even if I had a family, I just want some place I can go and be by myself.

I would always have to work even if I didn’t have too. My mind goes a mile a minute and can only be idle for so long before I get antsy.

I definitely would see the world. And then I would volunteer somewhere, I always wanted to help build a school, so I would do that.

You are inspiring me to get back into my photography! :)
Dominic Tay

May 15 08, 5:26 am PDT

30
Once again, thank you Tina for sharing with us the tips on mini-retirement. :)

I’ve stumbled and dugg this article. :)
Azeem
May 15 08, 6:15 am PDT

31
Tina,
Actually i came to know ur blog thru one of your comments on Zen habits..To say your blog is a beautiful one with lots of valuable and great content…Love the articles posted here…Will forward to be a part of ur community and also looking forward to see lots of helpful content in the future….Thanks for your posts..Good Luck and keep up the great work…

Regards
Azeem
FFB

May 15 08, 6:21 am PDT

32
I think it all depends on what you plan for your mini-retirement. If you plan to see tourist locations then there will be some stress with that. But a retirement should mean to get away and re-charge. Not so much to go out and make up for lost time but just stop work and round out the rest of your life.

All the money in the world. Well, I’d be in danger every day since the whole world would be after me! Or my money would be effectively worthless. But I get what you’re asking. If I had unlimited wealth I would definitely want to experience different cultures around the world. I think my hobbies would take more prominence too, maybe becoming more of a career of sorts (or a lifetime learning might be a better description). I would truly be able to spend quality time with my family and take a real good part in my kid’s growth.
Nina
May 15 08, 6:28 am PDT

33
I found that when I went to Europe for three weeks it was too much time away from home. I can’t even imagine what three months would be like!

If I had all the money in the world I move to the country and open a little bakery to share my baked goodness with everyone!
GreenTea

May 15 08, 7:13 am PDT

34
Wow! This is such a great article and I am so impressed by your site! And I just clicked over to adamtina.com…..thanks for making me feel like I took a trip to India without leaving my air conditioning!
AgentSully

May 15 08, 7:26 am PDT

35
I can totally relate. Our minds really do want to tackle new problems.

The thing is to choose problems that will make our life better such as creating good relationships, choosing our dream career, making a difference for others, etc.

Recently my need for new problems delivered a new puppy into my life. All the cute romance was gone very quickly as we began training her. But as she is getting better, I’m starting to see the fruits of my labor from training her.

We also need variety and security. Travel=variety. Home=security.
Nate
May 15 08, 8:15 am PDT

36
You got it, Live moment by moment. Philosophers have been so wise for centuries. It is usually a lesson learned the hard way. I guess thats why they call it self-awakening.

Perhaps your title is a little of-base. Instead of mini-retirements being a complete misconception, maybe it only shattered your own preconceived romanticism. Going to India is probably more opposite of the spectrum as any place on Earth from Seattle. There are many great places to disappear to that wouldn’t leave you so dissolutioned. Here are my favorites:

1) Work your way down the coast of Italy
Ancient Pompei Italy. For the archaeologist in you, this wonderland is literally like stepping back 2100 years. Most of the city is still in tact, but it is so tangible that you can feel how the Romans must have felt. Walk through the mansions, the bakeries, shops, horse stalls, roads, fountains. It really is mystifying for the imagination. Yes it is only a full day and not 3 months, but it sure changed my perspective.

Venice Italy. A lovers paradise. Sure this place is crawling with tourists, but the romanticism in the air is so thick, it certainly affected me & my wife.

Florence Italy, Yes another stop in Italy, the Italians sure put their passion into the culture. The entire city is giant Renaissance canvas, even the streets and gutters have style! Estimated 75% of all Renaissance works are housed here. This place just makes you awe at the creativity of man.

2) Switzerland - Just about every city in Switzerland is a Utopia. I lived in Basel for 3 months and absolutely loved it. I was stocking shelves in a grocery store and it was the best summer of my life! Simple, enjoyable, language challenges to overcome, friendly people to get to know. Luzurn, Basel, Lugano, Geneva, Zürich, they are all fantastic. The Swiss have a sustainable way of life, a national pride, politically neutral, friendly people and with 3 official languages, a short train ride will transport you into a new culture.

Actually, there are too many to list here. Tina, My point is, instead of discounting mini-retirements as just an escape from your current reality to the next, perhaps your experiences would have been much more enjoyable with a different destination and/or different objectives. Just as Tim Ferriss admits, mini-retirements need to be paired with something personally productive & gratifying. Such as spending those 3 months in an intensive language school. Or working for a non-profit building schools. Learning a new sport, working on a research publication, chef school, interning under an inspiring mentor. Whatever keeps you excited, stimulated and challenges you. Too much Idle time doesn’t feel right for the same reasons the weeds grow in the garden if you don’t tend it.

You right, Idle travel does get old, I reached some of the same conclusions as you did. But once you find more purpose for your explorations, it opens up a whole new world of inspiration!

Nate

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REPLY

Thanks for the suggestions Nate! Florence is one of my favorite cities in the world, Florence and Santorini in the Greek Islands. I’ve spend time there and will be back for something more substantial. Maybe language school or a photography project. I’ve not spent too much time in Switzerland, but I will.. thanks to your suggestions.

You’re also right about the title. :)
Sharad Shrivastava

May 15 08, 10:40 am PDT

37
Dear Tina,
If I ever sit down and sum up my Travel & all the memorable experiences, I cannot erase them from my thoughts ever.It has always brought in a smile on my face, a bliss of excitment and bundle of sweet memories neatly packed in for ever.
I have always taken great pains to work out every single details for my Holiday,be it Hotels,Food,places to visit…places that can be skipped.We always walk in to the destination with it’s glossy images one can ever imagine.
But sometimes reality can turn to be different.A reality shock can be fatal too.I have learned in such times, to keep your cool.Take your worries abay.Cheer up & smile to your heart…remind your self
” I am on a Holiday ”
Reverse on your decisions and go on to do what can please you best.
Pamper yourself all the way.Slow down your fast pace.If you are with your family, see that they are ” Truely Enjoying ”
Happiness is truely Divine.What else do you need from a Holiday….It is Happiness …with yourself & with your family.

I think if all that is taken care of…sometimes some shortfalls can be forgotten.
Dear Tina I thank you for visiting India & sharing all the wonderful experiences with of too.
Warm Regard’s
Sharad
James

May 15 08, 11:53 am PDT

38
Great, great, great post.

It seems like this would benefit a lot of people if they were able to do it at a young age (like the cliche travel around the world right after college), since a lot of people fresh out of college might have trouble putting things into perspective. I agree with you 100% about not taking things for granted. That really is one of the most important things in life that I wish more people would think about.
Karen
May 15 08, 12:41 pm PDT

39
I hear you Tina!
Tom Stine | Living from Consciousness

May 15 08, 4:13 pm PDT

40
Tina, your post reminded that “where ever you go, there you are.” Interesting that in most vacations, the best thing would be if we could take a vacation from ourselves. But, alas, we always go with us, don’t we? :-)

My love of travel has lessened in the past year. Not for any external factor, but simply because of the obvious fact that, as you said, “happiness is here, now.” I can be just as happy at home as elsewhere. Cool.

Nice post.
Alexa
May 15 08, 6:20 pm PDT

41
Great post and you’re so right! We travel a lot but never over 3 weeks at a time. The only reason I would go for a longer period of time would be — there you have it! for volunteering. But then I’d need to have some extra cash and the mortgage paid out :-)
With all the money in the world, I would do exactly what I am doing right now, I wouldn’t change a bit. I would only LOVE to donate more to people in need and certain causes that I heart. I feel that we need to do more, way more.
Ahaa1life
May 15 08, 9:08 pm PDT

42
Hi Tina,
I started following your blog a few weeks back. Your thoughts reflect your wisdom and balance of the personality. Amazing thing about the thoughts that struck me - you listen (and let flow yourself) to your inner buzz (may be even inside ‘chaos’ if its not too harsh ?) and capture the essence in structured way! Superb! Not many minds can claim to have that ability. Same is true even about your photo collection.
Let your blogs be an uninterrupted source of joy and inspiration to its followers.
Good luck.
Ahaa1life

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REPLY:

That is so sweet! One of the highest complements I’ve ever received. I am honored. :)
Thank you for the positive feedback and for reminding me that the act of writing for this blog is a source of joy for myself.

Hugs,
Tina
Lea Woodward

May 16 08, 4:47 am PDT

43
Hi Tina - thanks for the link to our blog.

Very honest post and I can totally relate to how you felt about longer term travel - it’s exactly how Jonathan & I felt when we travelled around Oz & NZ for 3 months (which I know is nothing like travelling round India!!)…”not another spectacular vista” became our daily comment. And then you have all sorts of feelings of guilt because you’re so privileged to be there etc. etc.

Do you think you’d feel differently if you had a project of some sort to focus on whilst you were travelling?

That’s certainly how we feel about our business - it’s the one constant in our lifestyle right now and at times we do wonder what we’d do if we didn’t have it to focus on, keep us productive and keep us focused and ambitious.

It does mean however that the travel becomes a way of life/type of lifestyle rather than being the destination or the goal.

If I had all the money in the world? I’d do what I’m doing now plus I’d set up a special kind of orphanage somewhere in SE Asia and give the kids an education and a ‘home’.
Gala

May 16 08, 6:28 am PDT

44
Tina, you’re fantastic, & you couldn’t be more right. I love your insights! <3
mentalNote

May 16 08, 8:33 am PDT

45
I completely sympathize with you. I’ve taken time to travel and have carried burdens on my shoulders regardless of my responsibilities.
It is important to experience other cultures, but home is your culture. Happiness comes from within, not from the excitement of adventures
Tania
May 16 08, 9:35 am PDT

46
Fantastic! It’s so good to hear someone be honest about traveling!
Lise

May 17 08, 2:02 am PDT

47
Tina, read this post over a few times, it so resonated with me. The words “Be careful what you wish for…” come to mind. One wonders if you would have felt different had it been an easier place to travel in, whilst India is definitely on my must see countries, the heat, the poverty and all the things that come with such a country could really test anyone for 3 months. I think too I would be craving the comforts of home and yet it really resonates because most of us are living in the future somewhere, hoping and wishing that things might be different from now.

Having just listened to Eckhart Tolle’s webcasts and read the book for a third time (it gets in the more you read it), I really am ‘getting’ being here now. Three simple words but this to me was the essence of your post.

Also, why this post is potent for me is because for so long with a career I was ‘wanting something different, anything other than what I was doing’. Then the eureka came, well if I just keep on keeping on doing the same things I must be happy in some way doing them. So an acceptance came over me, an aha moment, where I truly accepted where I was right then. And instead of the dreaming of countries far afield, I was sitting in my lounge room with a smile on my face.

The more I accept the nowness instead of running away from it, or zoning out from it, the more peaceful I become and appreciative, oh so appreciative of what I have and am.

Thanks for a brilliant post!
Hugs
Lise (Stumbleupon) x

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REPLY:

Hi Lise,

Thank you for sharing a beautiful comment regarding this post. You are right in getting that the essence of this article is “To be here now, and only by being here Now, can you experience lasting joy.” I took felt that I was in a place of ‘wanting something different, anything other than what I was doing’, and after this experience, I realized that the best opportunities for career growth and happiness right at home. I had taken advantage of how good I had it. So after coming back, I made some external change within my control (I interviewed with another team, for a position I’ve always wanted), and am now more satisfied than ever about my days at work.

Your comment reminds me that I want to meditate again. To have sometime everyday in silence and peace, to experience clarity and stillness.

Hugs,
Tina
ansi
May 17 08, 8:11 am PDT

48
If I had all the money in the world, I’d give it back. It wouldn’t be fair, you know? That said, if I could do whatever I wanted and not worry about money, I would donate a lot to research and investments - things like research in the health sciences and extending technology/resources to poorer countries. After that, maybe there would be time to open up safe havens for kids and young adults all over the world for them to learn about experiences outside of their own neighborhoods and if ever they need a productive environment, etc.

The idea of traveling constantly still appeals though. I’d love to go for one-week stays all around the world every two months or so.
Phalene
May 17 08, 8:42 am PDT

49
If I had all the money in the world? Move to a big city and work towards a career that was satisfying without worrying about money (and by extension) part time work. Right now, as a starving student, it feels like life is skut work, and it would be nice to do unpaid internships and volunteer work instead of retail & call centre work.

And being able to afford school entirely would be cool. It would be nice to be able to afford my own apartment instead of being stuck with the cheapest housing I could afford outside a cardboard box.

I think I’d want to travel, but not really more that I do now, just to more locations than I can currently afford. Europe, and so forth.

Money certainly wouldn’t make me smarter, prettier, a better person or luckier in life or love, but it would take some of the pressure off.
Larissa

May 17 08, 4:53 pm PDT

50
What a wonderful experience you had!

The mini-retirement sounds a lot like the concept of a Sabbatical - where you take a 6-month rest from work every 7-10 years. The time is generally used to make space for personal and spiritual growth and perspective, and to get restored in a deep way. I have several friends who have taken a Sabbatical, and had amazing experiences!
Eric Liao
May 17 08, 5:30 pm PDT

51
Good to have you back. As usual, your message always insightful. Doing nothing is not easy job. We human being tend to gain power or sense of self-mastery through doing. That explains why people repeat their mistake or bad habit over and over again. I personally take sabbatical since last Dec. most of time I stayed at home and realize doing nothing is better than doing wrong things though while I am trying to initiate project or goal which I think it’s right thing.
alicia
May 18 08, 9:49 am PDT

52
this article really affirms my own experiences! after I left my last full time position, I took 6 months off. I did not travel, I stayed home. I sometimes felt like I was not a go-getter when talking to others. They would ask, “That is great you are taking time off! What will you do? Will you travel?” I would say no, and explain my ideal routine of some exercies, yoga, gardening, relaxing at home, reading a lot, spending time with loved ones, and doing some home organization & personal projects. I often felt this response was not valued in our rush-run-do-it-all-once, max-out-your-life society. But if felt so right to me, and I am so grateful I had that opportunity to spend my time that way. One thing I surprisingly enjoyed was going to the grocery store in the middle of the day & taking my time picking out food for us. That is a very different experience from picking up some pre-made food in a rush on the way home from work. The grocery stores are very empty in the middle of the day :) It is invaluable in this society to regain control of scheduling our time, and how to spend it. How often do we really get to be in tune with our own rhythm of life, after work, family, social & practical commitments are covered?
Marsello

May 18 08, 12:16 pm PDT

53
Thanks for the advice, we tend to see that the grass is always greener on the other side without realizing that nothing is perfect in this world. Mini retirement is meant to rediscover our passion and to establish new routines which lead to happiness, so it all begins with what you’re saying about purpose. I’m planning to take a sabbatical in 2-3 years to pursue my passion in business in other countries, hopefully it won’t be just another routine for me ;)
Kelly@SHE-POWER

May 18 08, 6:56 pm PDT

54
Great article Tina, and you’re right most people probably couldn’t take more than 6 weeks of the unknowns and difficulties and mundane reality of travel without wanting to go home and live nice and easy again. I have travelled extensively in my life and am one if the people who always goes for 5-6 months and loves the challenge of learning a language and getting to know how other people live. I’m off to Spain, London and Paris this week for a month and I’m kinda nervous actually, wondering whether I’ll like something that is so obviously a “holiday”. So far Thailand is the only country I have been to where I have done vacation length stays and that’s perfect because you just lie around and rejuvenate.

For me the key to the long haul trick is
A) I write and different cultures inspire me so every day is worthwhile
B) Live in the moment and try to really connect with everyone. I have spent days just talking and exploring with people and then never seen them again, but I still remember them fondly now because human connection is a very special thing. For me, it;s what life is all about
C) Volunteer or Work
D) Study a language or anything really but stick around in one place and get to know the people, the food, and most importantly YOURSELF in a whole new context

But I agree it is nice to have a base to go home to. So if I had unlimited money I would live near where my home is now, on the beach for 6-9 months a year only taking mini breaks for a few days in Australia, New Zealand and Asia. Then for 3-6 months a year I would pack up and go travelling for part of it and then lease a house somewhere and settle into a new routine and write for most of the time. Then home again to start all over again. I get bored living in one place so this would be perfect for me and my family.

Nice article.
Kelly
J.D. Meier

May 18 08, 9:17 pm PDT

55
I agree.

I think the key is to unleash your passion in your job and explore more (whether it’s yourself, your job, or the world.) I used to think I needed to get away from work; instead, I had to reinvent my job and myself. I’ve made that a pattern now.

When I’ve done my cross-country road trips, I learned to appreciate home more and I learned that while a lot of places are nice to visit I wouldn’t want to live there. I also learned that simply traveling for the sake of traveling, wasn’t as rewarding. Instead, it was “why” I traveled, and “how” that really made the trips.

The most insightful thing from traveling was that when you travel, you are the only thing you take with you, for better or for worse. I ended up in a lot of scenarios where I wish I had more skills in certain things. That was my best wake up call.
Saintly
May 19 08, 3:18 am PDT

56
Great article Tina,

Reflections on past experiences can help change your view & the way we see things later on.

I spent time in India quite a few years ago as a part of a 12 month world trip, I was there mid Summer & it was bloody hot, I didn’t enjoy it at the time. Looking back now, it was the best country I visited for many reasons, mainly for the what I experienced, it reminded me of the 1920’s & the 1800’s mixed all in one. A crazy place.

I wanted to comment briefly on your tips for your mini retirement, in particular the first & last tips, No Expectations, I’ve learnt that our future can be a projection of what our Ego wants us to percieve, as you say, “can & does lead to dissapointment”. Go into the future with an open mind, expect & take nothing for granted !

Lastly “Smile” how hard is it, something so simple, we all should smile more often. “Laugh & the angels rejoice”

Cheers

Saintly
Evelyn Lim | Attraction Mind Map

May 20 08, 1:19 am PDT

57
Just to share, my mother-in-law went to India on a 3-month trip that claimed her life. A Caucasian, she had previously ordained as a Buddhist nun, so that she could renounce her cares. It was not a big deal to give up the cushy life that she had with us in Singapore but going to India was totally different.

As a nun, she could not carry money. And that was how she went - without a single cent. She only bought return air tickets.

My mother-in-law wanted to experience India because she thought the trip would enhance her spiritual growth. It was an opportunity for her to meditate at some of the holy places.

After a month in an Ashram, she was kicked out to stay on the streets. It was when she discovered how it felt like to live without a shred of security. If you have been walking on the streets, I am sure you will know how appalling the conditions can be.

In the end, she caught a disease through her gut. Hygiene was bad and she was living on scraps and sleeping in the open, under the stars. All these while, we never knew what happened to her, since she had no access to a phone or the internet.

She caught the return flight back but did not live more than 6 months after. Unfortunately, she never managed to write her book on her experiences and the insights that she gained.

It’s been already 3 years but the little that I’ve gleaned from her about life in India remains.

Evelyn

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REPLY

Wow, Evelyn. I’m so sorry. Thank you for sharing the story. I could just see her in my mind on the streets of India and that makes me sad. Really sad.
Nicholas Powiull (Conscious Flex)

May 21 08, 2:31 am PDT

58
This is a very detailed and informational article. It was a delight to read. Thank you for taking the time to write and post it.

You are one in a billion Tina :)

I added the 200th Digg to this article, keep up the fantastic work!
Trix
May 21 08, 2:40 am PDT

59
It was Arnold toynbee I think who wrote about a “window view” …

And the cliche goes “the journey is the destination”

Evelyn’s mother-in-law suffered a sad end… but stark reality can be brutal, as it is in Afganisthan, Somalia or Chechnia… or in the face of a natural / manmade disaster.

The Buddha told the snake which was stoned to the verge of death “Son, I told you not to bite, but did I forbid you to hiss?”

Imagine Gandhi trying to practise ‘Non-Violence’ in Hitlers Germany!

Keep up the good work…

; )
Suzanne

May 21 08, 8:01 am PDT

60
If I had all the money in the world, I would fulfill two lifelong dreams: 1) I would buy a little house in the mountains, 2) I would spend my days writing.

That is my bliss,

Suzanne.
girlrobot

May 21 08, 11:38 pm PDT

61
honestly i think the mistake you made was picking india as your mini retirement. i don’t know anyone who has gone there and enjoyed it! my answer is still traveling….but to more enjoyable and relaxing places. :)
jWells - Advanced Life Skills

May 22 08, 9:35 am PDT

62
Hi Tina,

First and most important of all - welcome back. Next, with
or without money I would be doing exactly what I am doing right now. Wow – it feels great to be able to say that.

Money is just money, but life is for living and enjoying. When we relegate money to it’s proper position, we can really appreciate the gift of life.

Rich or poor, young or old - once we learn to celebrate life each and every day, then we take our place among the wealthiest and happiest people on earth.

Kindest,
Jonathan
Andy T

May 22 08, 9:16 pm PDT

63
You reminded me when I was young, I travelled alone in Europe for a month w/ Europe by Train pass. I cannot remember in 1991 or 1992 Easter. I spend 600 pounds [British pound] for the whole trip. Super cheap budget. Killed 30 rolls of film. From Italy Sisley [walk up to see volcano] to Sweden Boden [try to get in Arctic Circle].
When you were young, you will do something crazy.
David

May 22 08, 11:24 pm PDT

64
You’ve tackle my obsession and my problem. I’ve seen my life, past and current life, as a mean to an end: to travel. Because then I’ll be happy. It’s great to read an article such as this to put things into perspective. Kudos!
Shirley

May 23 08, 8:44 am PDT

65
Great article Tina! Thanks for sharing your experiences with us. I can understand where you’re coming from. I recently spent several months taking care of sick and elderly parents. The demands of it, coupled with all the stress made me really appreciate my own comfortable life.

Check it out in my article “The Comforts of Home.” on Funspirit.
http://funspirit.blogspot.com/2008/03/comforts-of-home.html
Paolo

May 25 08, 2:22 am PDT

66
Hi, thank you for this article. It reminds me when my family went to Orlando them parks a few months ago, I couldn’t go because of personal issues, and I really wished I could be with them, relaxing, having fun.

Then when they came back they were exhausted, it seemed like they went to a training facility, all tired and irritated. Later I found out that they were rushing from park to park, from game to game, eating fast, etc. It really was an eye-opener for me on how NOT to travel.

You have great lessons, specially “Happiness is Here, Now”.

Love your blog,

Paolo
Kim Gray

May 25 08, 9:10 am PDT

67
I couldn’t have read this at a better time. My Husband and I are leaving in a month for the East to have our official honeymoon. We have both been swamped with work and social activities and keep saying things like we just need to make it one more month and we’ll be away.. or we can’t wait to escape etc etc…

You are so right! We take for granted what we have, who we have in our lives and we always think the grass is greener on the other side. I think I am going to be leaving on this trip with a very different attitude now and also not expect too much from it! ;)Thank you, I enjoyed you story!

–
Kim Gray
Stylist
Web: www.kimgray.za.net
Steve Nguyen

May 26 08, 9:18 am PDT

68
Tina: Welcome back! Although I’ve officially “retired” from blogging, I haven’t retired from reading blogs and commenting on them. To your question, what would I do if I had all the money in the world?

I would start my own crisis management and business consulting company. I would then travel the world offering workshops for free (requiring only room & board and meals for me and my wife).

Having worked for 3.5 years on a remote island in the Pacific Ocean, I saw (like you did) the shortage of things (which were mostly stuff but which were sometimes important). I noticed that while their hearts were in the right place their methods in achieving their goals were outdated or lacking. If I had money, I would return and offer free workshops (just like I did when I was there).

It’s good to share and, in the process, learn from others.
BK

May 27 08, 12:46 am PDT

69
Very insightful posting and sharing! I couldn’t have agreed more when you said not to take things for granted. Where I live, in Singapore, I believe a lot of people do take things for granted; like turning on the tap to running and consummable water, 24 hours electricity, clean public toilets etc.

Looking from their perspectives, they are not wrong in taking things for granted because they will never be able to understand from personal experience what you had been through. They can read about others’ experiences or watch it on TV and they may be affected when they see children on TV going hungry but after a while everything goes back to usual - unless they go through the experience themselves. I pity them in a way as they are like frogs living in a well.

I was once a frog, like a lot of people, until I was fortunate enough to live and work in one of the developing countries. As what you mentioned, when you are traveling as a tourist, you will eventually get bored especially if without a purpose. However, living and working in a country was one fantastic experience; I gotten to explore and to learn about a whole new culture, I had the opportunities to go to places that tourists never been to, I had the honor to attend some weddings and dinners etc. Those experience certainly enriched my life in a big way.

I agree with you on the point of Daily Gratitude as I do say out the things I am grateful for whenever I meet with challenges. That will allow me to focus on the positive things and to be back in control. Probably a better practise will be as what you mentioned, “At the end of the day, make sure to list out the things you are grateful for that day. You can do so by whispering out aloud with closed eyes and a smile just before bed.”

Thank you for sharing this post.
Craig
May 27 08, 12:15 pm PDT

70
Your site is intriguing and your thoughts after the India trip have really hit home.

All of my traveling has been for business. We always try to mix in a bit of fun and I can say that our hosts in each country have always treated us very well. I’ve been fortunate enough to travel to many different destinations and can say that I hold a fondness for certain people that impacted my experience in each of those countries. I think many of these would have developed into friendship if more time had been available. The memory of places or landmarks often fades but I never seem to forget the people.

Most of my trips have been 10-14 days each in countries all over the world (although I did spend a special three weeks in India). While business reasons take me to each location, I find the traveling experience extremely enjoyable and gratifying. Perhaps the business trips are so enjoyable due to the perfect mix of purpose, new experiences and paid expenses!

In the end, my perfect vacation (on personal time and personal dime) remains a week at home with the family. Most often, I find myself ready to go back to work.
Thanks for the blog. I plan to continue checking in from time to time.

Think Simple Now. A Blog on Creativity, Productivity, and Happiness.