Editor’s Note: The following is a conversation between Cat and her meditation teacher Sarah McLean. This is truly an inspiring piece. As I was editing this interview, I felt an inner shift happening within me and with it came a sense of serenity and peace. Hope this inspires you as it did for me. Sarah is truly an incredible and powerful human being. I look forward to learning from her. Don’t miss the giveaway at the end of this interview.

By Cat Li Stevenson

“Meditation is an essential travel partner
on your journey of personal transformation.
Meditation connects you with your soul,
and this connection gives you access to your intuition,
your heart­felt desires, your integrity,
and the inspiration to create a life you love.”
~Sarah McLean

A few years ago my husband and I drove to Sedona, Arizona to seek out a private mediation session.

At that time, I was embarking on a self-discovery journey, in deep inquiry about how to lead a more meaningful life. I had this fundamental restlessness that no longer had me fully engaged in daily life – I was uninspired by the complicated upkeep of the corporate hustle that was rewarded solely by material comforts.

Something was off. And I was seeking for answers.

With a mouthful of questions and ambiguity, I began to search outside for purpose and change: Should I move out of the country and teach English in Taiwan? Should I switch careers locally? Should I start a family?

Tucked away at the top of a mystical red mountain in Sedona, we arrived at the studio of meditation teacher, Sarah McLean. Though meditation wasn’t new to us, Sarah’s modern translation of meditation – coupled with our own thirst for change – sparked an inner exploration.

In the hour we spent with her, Sarah’s casual style, relate-ability, and guidance reoriented us to seek out a new life path.

Since leaving Sedona that afternoon, I have stopped looking outside for fulfillment: I wouldn’t move out of the country. I wouldn’t switch careers. I wouldn’t start a family.

I would, instead, become more still, contemplative, reflective … and take my attention inwardly. Not too long thereafter, my inner growth would manifest into external life-changing decisions (look for this new post next week).

Sarah’s practical guidance, as a mentor, has been influential in attuning to my inner wholeness. When she provided me a copy of her new book, you can imagine how excited I was to have this opportunity to share her inspirational wisdom with you—my TSN Family.

In Sarah McLean’s new book, Soul Centered: Transform Your Life in 8 Weeks With Meditation (Hay House), she offers a practical program, on a weekly basis, that instructs readers on how to explore our own awareness with mindfulness practices.

She provides bite-size, daily exercises that can ultimately transform the way we experience our lives with more ease and fulfillment. Alongside simple instructions for cultivating our inner world, she also generously shares her fascinating meditation journey.

The following is a conversation I recently had with Sarah, about life, fulfillment and the power of meditation:

1. How did meditation transform your life?

Question: Sarah, how long have you been a meditator? How did meditation transform your life?

I have been a meditator for 22 years, though I wanted to learn to meditate years before that. I just didn’t know where to turn.

I was a sad, stressed, confused young woman, and I searched everywhere-even traveling to other continents-to find peace and relief.

When I finally found meditation, it was the key to transforming my life—from one of suffering and pain to one of inner fulfillment.

My meditation practice helped me to know who I really am, what I truly want, and find that peace I had always searching for “out there”.

I am certainly living a fulfilling life now, and have been for years—a peaceful, satisfying and magical life—one beyond my wildest dreams!

2. Why Do We Struggle with Life Purpose?

Question: In your book, you outline an 8-week plan to a more meaningful life. What do you think is the main reason we struggle to live purposeful lives?

I believe the reason we struggle to live purposely is that what we prioritize in our life changes.

When we are very young all of us are basically joyous, free, and engaged with the moment at hand. There is an interconnection with our internal world – with what we feel, think, and desire – as well as with our environment. And this interconnection keeps our attention fully engaged in each moment.

By the time we’re 8 or 10 years old, our focus begins its shift. Instead of easily focusing inwardly on our own sensations, thoughts, and feelings as we had done as younger children, we begin to prioritize the external world with its variety, dynamism, and ever-changing landscape.

And by prioritizing the external world, our center-point begins its shift and our point of reference becomes the external world. This external world charms us as we wait for the next thing to see, to do, or to accomplish, or the next relationship.

So not only has our focus made its shift from the internal world to the external world, but the focus also shifts away from the present moment and our innate ability to be fulfilled with what is happening in the moment at hand and the joyous journey of our lives.

The focus is now on the future—waiting for the next moment as we struggle to reach our imagined goal, destination or whatever we perceive will MAKE us happy.

We are no longer fulfilled with the moment and feeling interconnected with our internal world and all that is supporting our life. This causes a subtle persistent discomfort. And, unfortunately, most of us continue to look externally for ways to address it.

Everyone wants to be happy, free, and fulfilled. And, here’s the thing, we already are – our soul, our being is naturally like that. And it is creative, wise, patient and loving too.

We can rediscover this aspect of ourselves by shifting our awareness back inside, into our inner world with the creating of an internally guided life.

It’s not that you have to sit around and meditate all day, but if you set aside some time for a meditative practice, a practice where you turn your attention inward, stay in the present moment, and focus on one thing at a time.

This facilitates the connection with your peaceful center-point on a regular basis, helping to re-establish the internal reference point – the connection to your soul.

Regular practice is how you become soul-centered, happy, fulfilled and creative.

3. What Is Transformation?

Question: The word transformation seems big – grandiose – what do you mean by transformation?

Transformation isn’t an exaggeration of reality or an absurd concept. Transformation isn’t an accomplishment. However transformation is impressive.

Transformation unfolds, naturally. You can’t will it. Instead, it has its own timing and intelligence and is guided by intent: like a seed growing into a seedling, a caterpillar becoming a butterfly, a bird hatching out of an egg, a rosebud in fully blooming.

The difference between making a change and undergoing a transformation is vast: a change can be temporary, and you can will it as you change your hair-color or your clothes or your name. You can always change back.

But transformation is evolutionary, and supported by all things.

There is no going back.

4. Soul Centered?

Question: And what does it mean to be soul-centered?

I came up with the term “soul-centered” to describe a shift in perspective which meditation cultivates: a transformation of the vantage point for one’s life. I’ve seen it in my students and in my own life. And there wasn’t a word for it.

For example: how do you answer the question, “How are you?” Many of us look to our external world to determine the response. We base how we’re doing on outside factors such as our relationship status, our work life, our state of health or wellbeing, our financial situation, and sometimes even on worldwide events.

With daily meditation, the external world begins to lessen its grip on your attention. Instead, you begin the inward focus and connect to your essence, your awareness, or what some people call “the soul.”

Though it’s always been there, your inner world often overshadowed by the external world. Meditation helps you to experience your inner world and how you feel, what you think and who you are – your soul. And you bathe in the soul’s qualities of peacefulness, stillness, creativity, wisdom, acceptance, and more self-awareness on purpose.

With this practice, this soul’s connection becomes more prevalent in your awareness—no longer overshadowed by external conditions. You begin to live with more internal awareness and your soul’s qualities are more dominant.

This transforms your perspective. So when you go to answer the question “How are you?” you don’t look toward externals. Instead, your reference point is internal. You check in. This is what being soul-centered means.

5. Science & Meditation

Question: What has science taught us about meditation?

Let’s face it, science hasn’t really taught us much about meditation, but what it has done is to confirm what meditators have been saying all along: that meditation is good for you!

And they’ve done meditation a good service, as this makes meditation more attractive to the general populace: those who may have previously been mystified by meditation and its attraction.

The outer world has been explored and much of it conquered, so as scientists are wont to do, they are finding new frontiers. And it’s now the inner world that has captured their attention. This is due to technology and the ability to measure deeper into the brain.

Years ago it was found that meditation helped with people’s physical issues, lowering their blood pressure, sleeping better, enhancing their immunity, etc. Then, it was found that meditation relieved mental issues like depression, lack of focus, addictions, or difficulty making decisions.

Over the last ten years or so, the new focus is the actual brain – or what’s called neuroplasticity. They see that meditation can actually change the physical structure—the gray matter—of the brain.

And not only do the changes occur while in meditation, but they last long after the meditation is over. They are finding that the areas of the brain change—the stress-response area of the brain shrinks (the amygdala) and the self-awareness area of the brain increases its folds (the insula).

These findings show beyond a doubt why those who meditate really do experience more compassion, more self-awareness, and less stress.

6. Transformation For Normal People

Question: You’ve had a pretty amazing spiritual journey – living in a Zen Buddhist monastery, meditating in ashrams, temples throughout India and the Far East – can we accomplish a similar transformational life in our ordinary routines?

Funny, when I first learned to meditate, I had this poem from T.S. Elliot cut out and pasted to my wall:

We shall not cease from exploration,
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started,
And know the place for the first time.

My journey took me all over the world. I loved where I went, the people I met, and the experiences I had, and wouldn’t trade it for anything.

However, the time I spent on planes, trains, buses, tuk-tuks and wagons, hiking and riding my bike throughout the remote areas of the world seeking wholeness, could have been spent exploring my inner terrain at home. You know the saying, Wherever you go, there you are. It’s true.

I was dissatisfied with my life, and I was motivated to find peace and fulfillment.

What I didn’t know then was that the external world is not where I’d find the answers to many of the questions I traveled with, such as Who am I? What are the mysteries of this life? What do I want? How can I be happy? How can there be peace?

I didn’t even imagine that the answers would be found when I quieted my mind, when I shifted my focus internally, and could be had without leaving my room.

It was often after some time of silently sitting in meditation that many of the ah-ha moments arrived.

Franz Kafka illustrates what I am suggesting: “You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait. Do not even wait, be quiet, still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked. It has no choice; it will roll in ecstasy at your feet.”

7. Who Am I?

Question: I remember when my husband and I first met with you for our meditation session, you asked us to reflect on the question, “Who Am I?” Throughout your book, you ask your readers to reflect on many questions – ­How does inquiry and meditation, together, play a role in transformation?

When you ask the question, “Who am I?” who is doing the asking? And who is it asking?

Who am I is a koan, a question that stops the mind’s rational response.

So, that instead of responding with reason, you dive into a deeper realm, the realm of being. When you do that, you begin to transform the way you see life and the reference point for all activity.

Who is the one reading this right now? Where does my awareness arise from? Ask and you begin a dialogue with something other than your intellect.And this gives you the direct experience of your soul, your being.

8. Meditation For Busy People

Question: We’re all so busy. Now in addition to eating well and going to the gym, I need to fit in one more wellbeing tool—-meditation. And you suggest 30 minutes/twice a day? Is there a secret to how to fit it into your life?

I’ve found, and so have my students, that when you fit in 20-30 minutes of meditation first thing in the morning, then your entire day goes more smoothly.

If you can’t do that, five minutes once a day will show some benefits. You see, meditation creates a settling of the mind and body, and relieves stress that has built up over time. This has an effect on your whole life.

Think about it, how long do you wait in line at Starbucks? How long do you spend surfing the Internet? Set your priorities. Give yourself the same amount of time to do something that will garner proven results – results that will ultimately transform your life.

Special Promotion

If this interview spoke to you, grab a copy Soul-Centered and actually try the bit size exercises from the book. Witness as your life transforms in an extraordinary way by integrating meditation into your daily ritual.

SPECIAL PROMOTION: If you order a copy of Soul-Centered by May 15^th email a copy of your confirmation to Sedonameditation@gmail.com and Sarah’s team will send you a copy of her Guided Meditation CD as a FREE GIFT ($20 Value).

Giveaway for You

We are giving away 5 copies of Sarah’s book Soul Centered: Transform Your Life in 8 Weeks With Meditation and beautiful Meditation CD to 5 people. Do you want one?

To Enter: Leave a comment below. In your comment, you can answer the question: “How do you want to feel?”

Alternative entries: tweet this article and leave a link to your tweet in the comment below.

Entries into the giveaway will close on May 31, 2012 at 8am PST. Make sure to use a real email address in the comments (Only TSN editors will see your email). If you’re a winner and we do not hear from you in 3 days, we will redraw.

Before you go: If you found this article helpful, please share it on Facebook, RT on twitter. Follow us on facebook and twitter. Subscribe to receive email updates. Thank you for your support!

More About Sarah

Sarah McLean is an inspiring contemporary meditation teacher, makes meditation accessible to everyone. She has been featured in the New York Times, and Phoenix Woman magazine calls her “an inspirational and dynamic teacher”

She has been teaching meditation since the early 90s and has worked with some of today’s great teachers, including Deepak Chopra, Byron Katie, Debbie Ford, and Gary Zukav.

To learn more about Sarah McLean and the retreats she’s created, you can visit Soul Centered, Sedona Meditation and Join her on Facebook.

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Photo by JUCO

Guest Contribution by Rebecca A. Watson

“Do not anticipate trouble or worry about what may never happen.
Keep in the sunlight.” ~Benjamin Franklin

A friend and I were on a beautiful hike through the redwood. It was early morning, and the mist still hung in the trees, but the sunlight had started streaming through the branches, little beams of heaven.

“I hope I locked the car,” she wondered out loud.

We both looked at each other and started laughing. Here we were in arguably one of the most beautiful and special places on the planet, and she couldn’t help but worry about the car doors.

It’s something we’re all guilty of, and it’s a tough habit to break: worry. It can rob us of our sleep, our joy and in many cases our sanity.

When I was only 21, struggling to pay for school and other bills, I made a rare discovery: Worrying won’t make me more money.

It was like a light bulb went on for me. Of course, it didn’t make me stop worrying completely, but I started to see worry for what it really was, and I knew I could beat it.

Over the years I’ve become much more adept at managing my inner worry-wart, and I’d like to share some of that, because I believe with a little practice, worry can be a thing of the past. And when it leaves, it creates more room for peace, love and beauty in our lives.

Insight into Your Inner Worry

The reason most people are angry, stressed out or filled with anxiety is because they can’t answer the burning question inside them: Why? In order to answer that, you need to get the hard data. This is the easy part, but it takes some legwork.

The following is a two-step process to gaining insight and understanding into your worries—recognizing what they are, when they happen and what triggers them.

1. Identify Your Hot-Button Issues

Keep a small notebook with you for three days. (Trust me, it’s worth it.)

Divide the pages into three columns. Every time you worry, write down what you worry about, when and where you are.

After the three days, go through your notes and tally up your “what” column.

There are usually a few big ones that stand out. These are the hot-button issues that cause us to worry. For me, it was money and how people perceived me.

2. Identify Your Worry Triggers

This is where your “when” and “where” columns come into play. Grab a piece of paper and a pen.

Draw out four (or less) columns. Write your top four hot-button worry issues at the top of each column.

You may have more or less hot-button issues than four. The point is to keep it to a maximum of four worries. I had two reoccurring worries: money and how people perceived me, and I just focused on these two for this exercise.

Write down the times and locations of each worry instance. Once you’re done, look through each column for patterns. Notice if you tend to worry more during a certain time or activity. These are your triggers.

For example, I found that I would worry about money after I looked at catalogs or magazines.

Pay attention to the “whens” of each column where you find yourself worrying about things, and start to become sensitive to them. Take proactive steps to avoid your triggers.

For example, in my case, I unsubscribed to a lot of magazines. I quit looking through catalogs. Immediately, I felt a lot better.

When you can’t avoid your triggers, be aware that you might worry more but to not take it so seriously. Tell yourself: “I’m just worrying about that right now because of A, B or C.” And move on.

How to Deal with Your Inner Worry-Wart

Learn to have conversations with your inner-worrier. This is vital. The voice in your head that worries is there for a purpose. There are certain things that should make your hair stand up.

But just because that worrier is supposed to be there doesn’t mean it belongs in the driver’s seat. This is when knowing your triggers become vital, because it gives you factual ammunition that can help your worrier calm down.

1. Be Kind and Encouraging

I’ve read a lot of self-help books that say you’ve got to be aggressive toward certain parts of yourself in order to tame them into submission.

I disagree. We have enough tough love in the world. It’s time for a little kindness. Your inner worry wart is frazzled enough working overtime, oftentimes in unstable conditions.

When you start chatting with the part of you that worries, remember that this part of you can be like a child: Handle with care. Try to avoid chastising or saying hurtful things.

Use phrases that are friendly. “I understand that you are worried.” Be empathetic. “It must be hard work worrying like this all day. ” Offer to be helpful. “What can I do to make things easier for you?”

2. Ask Questions

Start with the easiest: “What are you worried about?” And then let your worrier talk. Then ask: “How does worrying make you feel better?” Listen to what it says.

Then talk with it about the triggers. “Do you think you’re just worrying because we spent time doing this activity?” Your inner worrier might have a bit of an ego, but if you’re kind, it will usually admit the truth.

Then ask the kicker: “What will worrying about this do?” The answer is almost always nothing. “So why do you continue to worry?” To which your worrier can’t say much.

3. Gratitude & Compliment

When your worry-wart gets to that point where it admits that there isn’t really a reason to worry, celebrate with it! When you notice it’s been quiet from worrying, compliment it.

But understand that it may still want to hold on to the habit because it feels like that is all it’s good for. It may feel useless without the unnecessary worry.

This is why it’s important to acknowledge how grateful you are when it’s quiet. And it’s also important to compliment it when it speaks up in a situation that’s questionable.

“Thanks so much for speaking up when I thought about going through that deserted field at night. That was a bad idea.”

4. Be Vigilant But Be Patient

Worrying is a habit that for many of us, is as old as we are. You can’t break a habit like that in a week. Or even a month.

Even now, a decade after my realization, I catch myself worrying about finances, going over my bills in my head or mentally balancing my checkbook.

At this point I have to remind myself that I trust myself, I make good choices and most importantly, that worrying isn’t going to make my bank account balance go up. And then I move on.

The End to Worry

If you spend some time working with yourself and make a commitment to worry less, I can guarantee that other parts of your life will become more beautiful.

The space you create by removing worry will be filled with wonderful things. You will have more mental and physical energy and your body will thank you for it. I encourage you to grab a notebook and give it a try!

* What do you worry about? What did you learn from this article? Share your thoughts and insights with us in the comment section below.

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About the Author

Rebecca is a fierce optimist who believes in the power of making life happen. After realizing optimism doesn’t jive with journalism, she left newspaper to create her own brand of marketing through education and humor. Balance and mindfulness are her latest pursuits, along with learning to knit. Read her blog and follow her on Twitter for her latest enthusiastic (and sometimes witty) remarks.

Related Stories on Overcoming Worry:

• How to Be The Luckiest Person
• Synchronicity – The Beauty of Coincidences
• How to Stop Negative Self Talk
• How to Ignite Personal Change

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Photo by Anna Gay

Guest Post By Priya Khajuria

“Families are the compass that guide us. They are the inspiration to reach great heights, and our comfort when we occasionally falter.”
~ Brad Henry

There’s a vase full of roses on our dining table. Each week it’s a different color or a new variety. The first time I had the roses there, as soon as they turned slightly droopy I threw them out. Why not, right? I mean they weren’t doing anyone any good, looking so old.

One day, instead of throwing them out, I trimmed them a little bit and put them in a smaller vase. They perked right up and thrived for quite a while before it was time to throw them out.

As time went by, I got wiser. As the roses aged, I found a smaller vase to fit the trimmed stems. Then later transferred them into a mini vase. Finally I floated the blossoms alone, minus the stems, in a large white bowl to accentuate their beauty.

In a last gush of sentiment, I pulled the rose petals off the bowl blossoms when their time had come and sprinkled the petals into the bath, sprinkled them into a bowl, or dried them and left them out –whatever I could do to preserve their fragrance and sweetness.

I noticed something…as they aged, something else happened. Have you ever noticed how a new rose is so tight and complete, as though it is protecting itself…and then as it ages, each layer begins to curl outwards in the most lovely manner?

It’s as though the more it ages, the more open and beautiful it becomes. There are less barriers, there is more vulnerability and there is the presence of exquisite joy in its very being.

In a flash, I saw that my roses were not the only things in my life I had seen with limited awareness. Much to my sorrow, I realized that I had viewed my parents in exactly the same way: I’d been quick to discard them, judging my parents through the eyes of others, dismissive of them in the pursuit of what I wanted.

I was completely unaware that there could be a middle ground, a safe place to discover my purpose and yet stay within their warm circle. The more immature I was, the faster I pushed them out and away.

I realized that I had stopped appreciating the wonders of life and the kindness of others. I had stopped smelling at the roses. I had no time to enjoy the glowing sunsets.

Magnifying the pressures of daily work and annoyances had shrunk my capacity to recognize that I already had a beautiful life. I had diverted myself from where I really wanted to go and who I wanted to be.

I had been focusing on all the wrong things. When I forced myself to stop and just let myself be, everything around me came alive again. When I silenced my mind and became present, life simply fell into place. It had been there all along.

I finally understood the power of focus.

As I gazed at the beauty of my roses, I saw that my parents were still beautiful too. The realization was humbling. I was able to look at my parents with the wonder they must have once looked at me…the way I look at my children.

And when I see my mother now, I can see the Rose Rio Samba, delicate pink on the outside, revealing vibrant and joyous flashes of deep gold as it unfolds. My mother appears conservative but has an unusually ambitious exterior laced with unexpected bursts of gut-bursting humor and is dusted with the icing of golden-age Bollywood beauty and glamour.

My father…well I think of Knockout Roses. They’re resilient and powerful in an understated Jain kind of way. At first I thought he might be a purple, spiritual kind of rose but the more I got to know my father, I realized he’s the Sunny Knockout Rose.

He is bright and sweet but understated by his own choice. He is grounded and balanced–and like the Sunny Knockout–he contrasts nicely with brighter blooms (read: my mother the Rio Samba). And like anything else understated, one wouldn’t notice my father at first, in his quiet ways. It took years for me to set aside the resentment of youth, the focus on the thorns, to see the peaceful and loving man my father is.

I am grateful to realize this now, while they are still here. I am grateful for the richness & color that they bring to my life. The dreams I dream, the things I wish for…many seem to revolve around my parents in some way, and yet I know I am my very own “rose” as well.

The daily grind can be put away on a shelf at the end of the day. It is muting into the background while the richness of life, my family, my friends and my purpose becomes far more real in the light of awareness—infused with the vibrant colors of life.

Everything has come full circle. Everything is flowering in its own time, as it should.

~ ~ ~

How about you? Do you see your parents like week-old rose stems, ready to be tossed aside for a newer flower? Or can you appreciate the color that they can continue to bring to your life, even as you grow & flower & bring other plants into your garden?

How can you continue to appreciate them, or their memory if they have passed on? How can you view every rose in your garden— whether they be parents, friends, coworkers, spouses, or children–as beautiful and worthy in your sight? Here are three ideas:

1. Time— a garden’s beauty does you no good if you never enter it. Turn off your gadgets, put away your work, and just be fully present with the people in your life.
2. Water— flowers wilt without water, and so do the people in your life. Tell them what they mean to you, through little notes & emails, hugs, gifts, whatever “fertilizer” they most enjoy.
3. Pictures— Why do you take a picture of a rose? To cherish its beauty. So why not do the same with the people you love? Take out the camera, and make some memories you will cherish for decades to come. Take written “pictures” too, by journaling what they mean to you, just as I have done with my parents.

Keep expanding your awareness, and I guarantee you that all the roses in your life will bring you more & more joy. Happy gardening!

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About the Author

Priya Khajuria is a writer, singer and homeopath. Her chick-lit mystery novel Bollywood P.I. features a homeopath-turned-P.I. who stumbles into a major crime organization.
Priya also practices homeopathy and publishes health-related articles and resources at Vibrant Health..

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By Pooja Lohana

“Problems are to the mind what exercise is to the muscles,
they toughen and make strong.”
~Norman Vincent Peale

I am a self-employed freelance writer and if you have ever worked for yourself (or worked at a demanding job), you can probably related to the sentiment that stress from work is one of the biggest factors that can cripple your mind and body.

Since our goal at Think Simple Now is for all of us to live a happy life, in this post I will share a story of when stress broke me down and the 5 lessons I’ve learned while coping with stress.

As much as being your own boss is fun and it can give you the tremendous freedom, it can also be extremely demanding and emotionally stressful. You end up wearing many hats in your company: marketing, HR, the IT person, customer relations and CEO. If I stopped working, so will my business. All pressure is on me.

As the day starts, my brain races through the list of tasks that “must” be fulfilled during the next 10-12 hours. Sometimes, I’d get so distracted that I would completely ignore what my partner just said. Sometimes, I would rush through a whole day and not remember what I ate for breakfast.

Has this happened to you? Can you remember the last time you brushed your teeth or bathed mindfully?

Progress and stress seem to go together. There is hardly anyone who manages to glide through life with zero stress.

Frankly, I believe stress is there for a reason—and a good one. In terms of a simple equation, it is a negative motivation that if X doesn’t get done, Y will result. Y is not something attractive and you’d like to achieve Z. So X must be done at any cost.

But if we let stress take over our lives, we lose control and fail to achieve anything. It becomes a hurdle instead.

I have come to realize that more than getting things done, more than self-motivation, more than self-discipline and any commitment, I first must tackle one serious concern: the stress in my daily life.

It is true that we cannot completely eliminate stress from our lives. But we can minimize it to create a more controlled, productive and enjoyable experience here on earth. And it is possible irrespective of how “hard” your goals are to reach.

In other words, if you decide to beat stress, you will. How? We’ll talk about 5 ways on coping with stress. But first, a personal story.

Personal Story on Stress

Recently, I was beaten by stress left, right, center.

I felt like a squirrel running in a cage. I had several projects on my platter—a new non-fiction book to be ghost-written; a bunch of articles to be edited for a personal trainer; a press release to be written for a magazine; interview questions to be devised for an expert/scientist in the field of climate change and some editing work for Tina.

As you can see, the projects were pretty spread out and a bit all over the place. But this was nothing new. However, this time something entirely outside of my expectations happened.

I was starting to get furious because I couldn’t achieve things as scheduled and when I did, I saw my quality suffer. Tina asked me to relax, and write from a place of inspiration.  I tried several recommended resources and tried to relax.

Yet, nothing much happened. I kept losing.

Then I was asked to take a break and come back to it when I felt inspired.

But I didn’t take a break. I continued to force the creativity out of myself. “Come out! Show me your face. I am waiting.” I pleaded my muse. I was not letting this go. The fight was on.

Zilch.

Needless to say, I was exhausted. Do you know why I lost? Can you figure why I couldn’t force the creativity out of me? Because I couldn’t give myself permission.

“What permission, Pooja”?

Permission to . . . fail. Permission to feel low. Permission to feel unmotivated. Permission to just be even if it meant being unproductive for a while.

Do you know what I mean? Can you relate?

Being a driven person, I’ve never missed a deadline—it was just “not me”. So I used the persuasion tricks on my body and mind.

“Come on you two, if you bring me fresh ideas I will give you a break. I will give you fresh air. I will love you more.” I’d try to convince myself.

The more I fought and forced my creativity to show up, the more it hid from me. The farther I ran away from feeling pathetic—well, you guessed it—the more miserable I was! In the end, I was more worn-out and stressed-out.

So what was happening? How was I, the sole member of my company, supposed to break this cycle of stress and keep myself going?

My Revelation about Stress

After about 2 weeks of this back and forth action, I realized I had to stop. Just be still and look straight at myself. No more pretenses, no more running away.

Finally, yesterday, at 5 am in the morning, I woke up, sat still in my bed, and just observed in silence.

There was a cry from my ego—it tried to distract me. Basically, it tried to prevent me from feeling pathetic. But I continued observing.

I felt every single emotion that was chained inside me. From a deep sadness to a feeling of bubbling enthusiasm for the future. I was overwhelmed with tears. I had just given myself the permission. And it didn’t suck at all.

I realized that it was  . . .

• okay to not be perfect every single time
• okay to take time off
• okay to accept the highs and lows of your productivity
• okay to love and hold your inner child

I understood the most important thing for me was not finishing everything on time, not producing exceptional work, not even prioritizing things—no.

The number one thing for me to do, as I realized in that moment, was to accept my present state of mind. After I did this, I was truly let free.

5 Ways of Coping with Stress

I am not going to pretend these methods will make you stress-free for life. But they will prove to be your armor against stress and help you minimize your everyday tension. If you’re looking for a once-and-for-all kind of solution, I’m sorry to disappoint you. Progress and stress tend to alternate like ebb and flow of life’s waves, so let’s just accept it before we move further, shall we?

In those two weeks of coping with stress, I employed some ways to gradually feel better. And I did.

Stress Coping Method #1: Banish the Media

It is not surprising—most of the negative information comes from various media.

I don’t ask that you completely disconnect from the external world or that you don’t stay abreast with the latest happenings around. But while you do so, remember that what sells is always what’s broadcasted.

Stay away from the toxicities of news. Choose what you’d like to feed your psyche and reject the rest. Be mindful while you engage with the media and consume information.

Stress Coping Method #2: Move Your Body

Life is movement. If you go beyond the atom level in a human body, you will find what remains is pure energy. And you will notice a beautiful movement in this energy. Our bodies are meant and made to move.

Make sure you exercise in regular doses—even 15 minutes of simple stretching exercise everyday will help you stay rejuvenated for hours. Also, make sure you take ample breaks from your home-office desk. Get up, drink a glass full of water, stretch and come back afresh!

Stress Coping Method #3: Don’t Panic

That morning I realized that even though I was blessed with a lot of loving people in my life, not everyone will choose to remain a part of my life forever. It’s harsh and gave me the shudders. But it was ultimately a truth.

Another truth I realized was that there was just one entity who will always be there for me—always. No strings attached. And that’s my inner self. In good times, and in bad, it is there to comfort me.

So what’s the point to panic? None. Whatever happens, always remember you are not alone. Don’t panic.

Stress Coping Method #4: Morning Rules

Being a work-from-home gal, I didn’t have any restrictions of waking up early. However, I noticed that no matter what time I woke up, there were some “morning no-no’s” that when followed led to a more peaceful and more clear state of mind. Some of the things I stopped doing first thing in the morning were:

• Reading newspaper or watching TV
• Worrying about what problems I have
• Trying to be perfect
• Check my email or facebook

Our brains are most receptive in mornings. It is therefore best to avoid the above items. In the same way, there are some morning routines I’ve started to do:

• A 5-minute silence first thing I wake up
• Being easy on myself
• Having a proper breakfast
• Treating myself well—jumping into shower with rich aroma oils that leave a lasting feel-good effect
• Choosing a new place to write, like a café or my local library, if the desk doesn’t invite my creativity
• Taking a walk in the park near my house

Stress Coping Method #5: Become Financially Aware

I left this for the end because I wanted to highlight the other stress coping methods more. Still, I cannot deny finance is one huge source of stress for many people.

Are you aware of your expenses? Do you do your own taxes? Even though you hire someone else to do them, do you understand the whole thing? Do you strive for a better and improved financial independence? Do you have a mental block when it comes to wealth?

Money has earned a bad name but it is important even though you have a great house, relationships and marriage. Lack of money is a stress accumulator. Therefore, it’s important we remain aware of our finances all the time.

~ ~ ~

I have one last thing to ask of you: Listen to your inner child when it is feeling low. Accept that stress is there and focus on dealing with it rather than on it. Once you give yourself the permission to feel bad, that too shall pass and everything will look brighter in the morning.

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About the Author

Pooja is a writer and editor residing in Melbourne, Australia. She is the rock-star Editor on our brother site Work Awesome. She is also on the team of editors for several Australian publications.

In March 2010, after fully awakening to her passion for writing and publishing, she left a successful software engineering career to pursue her love for writing.

Today, she works from home in her jammies, while enjoying a view of sunny Melbourne from her balcony. Read more about her at her blog– Of Parchments & Inks.

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By Cat Li Stevenson

We’ve been deep-cleaning around the house lately: donating old clothes and getting rid of any extras that have been unused for sometime. In order to create ease with our daily routine, we’ve been simplifying our home and life.

My husband and I have a lot of random items from previous moves that we’ve been unable to shake – mainly sentiment that has spared numerous boxes of trinkets from our childhood or souvenirs from our travels.

But we honestly have no use for any of this stuff. They’re space-takers – they’re extras.

In an effort to simplify our life, we often turn to our material possessions: de-cluttering, donating, and organizing our space to create a sense of calm.

I imagine that one (or more) of the below may be true for each of us:

• We feel the burden of too much stuff.
• We bought a material item for temporary happiness.
• We own big-ticket possessions — the home, the car, or the debt for whatever else — that we spend much of our time and energy working for.

I’m in whole-hearted agreement that the collection of materialism can have a nagging tendency to feel overwhelming at times.

Simplifying, on a life-scale, can seem like a daunting task— but I’m here to offer some good news:

We don’t have to reject all consumerism, move to a remote island, or follow a strict Zen routine in order to experience the inner peace that comes with simple living.

We can start now – this very moment – with all the daily extras we carry around with us.

Beyond physical clutter, most of us carry accumulated stuff with us each day – mentally.

Today, we can start getting rid of those extras:

• The constant rushing through errands, conversations, and stop lights in order to get to the next moment – that’s extra.
• The questioning of our intuition and straying from our values for temporary fulfillment – that’s extra.
• The replaying of our busy, all-consuming to-do list throughout the day – that’s extra.
• The long-winded lecture that accompanied the request of our significant other to put the toilet seat down – that’s extra.
• The justifying excuse about why we didn’t fulfill a commitment – that’s extra.
• The woulda-coulda-shoulda self-talk about the interview for a prospective job that happened a few hours ago – that’s extra.
• The split attention of back-and-forth text messaging, while playing with our child– that’s extra.

• The grasping for external diversions to distract us of what needs to be addressed internally – that’s extra.
• The checking of emails sporadically throughout the day, while supposedly focusing on an important deadline – that’s extra.
• The saying yes to a commitment, event, project, happy hour, baby shower when our schedule is already overbooked– that’s extra.
• The all-consuming plan for the future that robs us of what we are doing now – that’s extra.
• The agonizing over the piece of cake we managed to scarf down (oops!) hours earlier in the day – even that is extra.

We crowd our mind with extras each day – harmful self-talks, incessant worrying, attention-comprising multi-tasking, unnecessary busyness – that muffle the simplicity we can be experiencing right now.

If we did not carry the extras of mental clutter…

We could begin to uncover the bliss of inner peace. We could show up, wholly, in everything that we do, deepening our connection to both ourselves and with others because we’re fully present with our attention.

Simply Your Life By Simplifying the Mind

The de-cluttering of a home may appear easier to navigate than the inner-world of mental and emotional clutter. But the two are not so different: just as with our physical world, we can begin to organize our inner-environment by creating space.

Here are a few ideas on where to begin:

• Listen to your inner wisdom. What is speaking to you about the lack of clarity at this moment? Observe what is asking for your attention – then proceed to address, accept, forgive, or simply let go to create room for clarity.

• Revisit and reconnect with your values. Discard all the commitments that do not serve your higher intents. Life is too precious to settle for a compromised scheduled; live each day aligned to your purpose.

• Become aware of a recurring fear-based thought that may create clutter, anxiety or an overwhelming feeling– replace it with an empowering affirmation. For example, perhaps you often worry about tight finances. An affirmation to replace a negative thought of not having enough money could be: “I am prosperous, I am secure, and I am surrounded by an abundance of financial opportunity.”
• Journal to detoxify on what’s going on inside. Allow the release of emotions onto a piece of paper to become a routine cleansing. Self-awareness is a powerful tool for constant clarity. So often we become stuck in a rut of mental exhaustion because we haven’t given ourselves the opportunity to release. Stay connected with your emotional and mental well-being by integrating journaling into your daily routine.

• Begin a meditation practice for 20 minutes each day to sweep the mental barriers clean. Meditation is a sanctuary for a busy mind to relax.

• Account for the overdue commitments, bills, and errands by purging them all onto a calendar with due dates. Many tasks only require a small, dedicated amount of time to complete; yet, it’s often easy to compound the urgency or difficulty by replaying the list over and over.The intent of putting these to-do’s on a calendar is to liberate our attention, and allow us to return to the present.

When we remove all the extras by creating more space…

We will begin to feel the simplicity of living each moment as it is meant to be.

We can freely bask in the awareness of being alive.

We are happier and lighter.

What inner wisdom kicks in for you when you’re faced with a lot to do?

What good habits can you share that cultivate a clutter-free mind that allows for simple living?

What can you do – today — to make space for clarity that will contribute to your well-being?

*Share your thoughts and wisdom with us in the comment section. See you there. :)

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About the Author

Cat is an idealist that finds meaning and inspiration in all dynamics of her day – the strangers that become new friends, the synchron-destiny that reveals a little about the mysteries of life, the self-discovery, laughter, and transformations that happens on this adventurous journey.

For her day job, Cat is a corporate banker, real estate agent, and nutrition coach. She embraces mind-body wellness; waking up before sunrise for yoga & meditation and closing the evening with a jog with her best running buddy – her super-fit hubby, who was also her high-school sweetheart.

* Click here to read all articles written by Cat.

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Note: This article was extracted from the daily emails.

By Tina Su

Monday, last week was a crazy ride of a day. First, it was my son’s one year old birthday, and we were planning a big party – 24 adults and 8 babies. Second, we were notified that we’d won the Good Mood Gig contest!

The day consisted of a lot of running around, last minute shopping, cooking for over twenty people, writing the announcement blog post, and taking part in the excitement on facebook. I don’t think I ate anything all day until 9pm.

The party was a success, people looked like they had a good time. We had loads of food, helium balloons, and a lot of red wine to keep many of the adults happy. Ryan was properly dressed in a suit vest with a red tie, and brown dress pants.

I ran around, making sure the food was all laid out, that people got drinks, and that everyone had their photo taken in our makeshift portrait studio we had temporarily setup in the garage (Photos from the party can be seen here).

When everyone left for the night, Ryan was asleep in his room, Jeremy went to the gym, and our moms were in the kitchen putting away leftovers; I was left standing in our empty living room, with colorful helium balloons floating happily in the air, baby toys spread out on the floor, and traces of cake left on tables, the floor and chairs by all our adorable young guests.

Despite a lot of excitement, I felt a little empty. I had spent so much energy running around, making sure everyone was happy, that I wasn’t very present. I wasn’t really fully here, enjoying the party, or spending quality time with Ryan.

You know that feeling, like you’re running 100 miles an hour, in a race through life, doing something that you thought was important, only to slow down and realize that you’re not fully enjoying it? That you weren’t present? That your mind was elsewhere, while your body was moving with the rhythms of what you’re expected to do?

I don’t mean that I didn’t enjoy the party, or that it wasn’t important. I really loved seeing all our friends who took the time to come by. I loved seeing the babies play and smile. I loved preparing for the party – buying party hats, and thinking about what to feed everyone. I just wished that I were more present when everything took place. I wished that I were in less of a rush, and more established in the peaceful place within me.

In a way, psychologically, I feel like I’ve missed out on Ryan’s party, because I wasn’t really there, mentally. Too much of my focus was on our guests, and making sure everything went okay.

At around 1am that same night, as I was in my office writing down these thoughts, I heard the familiar sound of a baby crying from across the hall.

Usually, (especially when both grandmas are in the house) I would wait for one of the grandmas or Jeremy to get up first. My mother-in-law has an especially gifted touch with babies, and she can magically put Ryan to sleep better than any of us.

But on this night, I got up from my desk, walked into Ryan’s room, and picked him up from his crib. I wrapped him in a warm fleece blanket, and sat down in his glider. We rocked and rocked. And I hushed and hushed, until he fell asleep on my chest.

He is so big now. His once tiny body, which could fit entirely on my chest, is now all stretched out; he’s now so long, his legs and feet dangling off the side of the glider. I could feel his legs brushing against me with each rock of the chair.

His head lay gently on my right shoulder. And I could hear the soft hiss of his breath, whispering dreams of bliss in my right ear.

I leaned forward slightly to kiss his forehead and told him how much I loved him, and how blessed I was to be his mom. And I whispered happy birthday.

He has taught me so much about love, in the unique way that only a child can teach his mother. Tears rolled down my face, and I was filled with this enormity of love that burst out of my physical body, surrounding us, wrapping us, taking us in and keeping us warm.

I am thankful that I got another “chance” to be with him on this special day – a day that marked the one-year anniversary of the day that changed my life forever; the day that I was granted with the biggest blessing of my life – the day that I became a mother.

Suddenly, those mind created problems, which were nibbling at me during the day, melted away. Everything else, especially problems from the past of which I have little control over, became less irrelevant or interesting. And being fully present in this moment, sitting here in the dark, holding my little boy, became the most rewarding, fulfilling, and joy-filling experience. It was magical.

I felt love and I felt loved.

I was reminded that everything that’s important to me was in this house right now – my son, husband, mother, in-laws, my blog, and our dog tommy. And that whenever I find my mind wandering off to some land of nothing, distracting me away from this moment, or causing me negative feelings, I will return to being present.

If anything that I spend my energy on doesn’t contribute towards the wellness of those people and things most important to me, I will stop, and re-shift my focus. That is my new motto.

This day has been an important day. I felt that I’ve reached a new plateau in my own “inner awakening”. I felt an important shift that took place in my being. I’ll expand on this topic soon.

Until then, wishing you peace, clarity and happiness.

Love,
Tina

P.S. Want more articles than the blog posts on this site? I’m trying something new, and are experimenting with daily writing that reflects on something I’ve learned each day. This article was extracted from the daily emails. You can subscribe here to receive my “Thought of the day” emails.

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Photo: Simón Pais-Thomas

By Jonathan Mead

Life is mostly made up of routines and patterns. Every day we act them out and they are what make up the bulk of our lives. Many of us live according to a socially acceptable template, within the realm of safety, while living repetitively and dreaming of ways to escape.

I used to revolt against these routines. I saw them as the enemy of adventure and of living a spontaneous life. However, I’ve found that routines can be quite blissful. I’ve realized that every day events and what we would commonly classify as “normal”, is often extraordinary if you just take a closer look.

I’ve discovered that even if you’re not exactly where you’d like to be, that doesn’t mean that life right now can’t be beautiful or enjoyable. And the best part is, you don’t have to do anything to make it beautiful. It already is beautiful.
All you have to do is open your eyes.

Seeing Things Differently

We are constantly surrounded by miracles, but we do not recognize them because they come to us so gracefully and seamlessly.

For example, have you ever thought about how many different processes have to be organized simply to create the experience you’re having right now? Imagine if all of that was a conscious effort. Imagine if you had to think about breathing, or think about listening to music. You don’t, it just happens. Isn’t that amazing?

Now multiply that by a trillion. Every breath, every movement, and every condition that’s creating the possibility for you to be alive right now is a miracle.

We often get inundated with our To-Do lists, or get caught up in the drama of things that aren’t really important. Realizing that beauty exists in every moment is possible; it simply takes a way of seeing things a bit differently.

Boredom due to routine is a creation of the mind. In reality, there are no ordinary or extraordinary moments. There is beauty everywhere. If you truly understand this, you can look at any ordinary object and find beauty in its existence. You can see a pile of rotting compost and realize that within that organic waste is the possibility of a garden of flowers.

I’ve found that there are a few easy shifts that need to take place, in order to create a state of constant awareness of how amazing life is. Most of the time we only catch a glimpse of how amazing things really are before we get sucked back into the monotony of our routines. We lose mindfulness.

In order to make awareness of beauty a permanent fixture in your life, you need to practice being mindful and aware. I don’t claim that practicing these principles is easy, but the benefits are worthwhile when we bring consciousness into our daily existence.

1. Practice Listening

One of the biggest blocks to recognizing all of life’s extraordinary moments is that we often don’t stop to listen. We’re too busy talking to ourselves. If we’re thinking all the time, we’re living entirely in a world of symbols. We’re living in a world of abstractions about reality; words that describe, label, and categorize things. This can be a wonderful tool for communication, but it can also be a curse when it gets out of control.

If we’re always thinking, we’re never in a relationship with reality. In order to become intimate with life, we need to listen. Imagine that every time you interacted with someone, you were the only one talking. There would be no communication, because you never gave the other person a chance to speak. It works the same way when you’re communicating with life.

Instead of thinking all the time and getting lost in your own thoughts, slow down and just listen. Put your focus on listening. When you find that you are drifting away in your own thoughts, gently bring your focus back to listening.

2. Practice Non-Judgment

Have you ever noticed that when you judge other people, it immediately puts you in a negative mood?

Usually, the judgments we make are because other people aren’t conforming to our version of the way we would live. Everyone’s values are different, and that’s what makes life interesting. While there are some justifiable judgments you can make, they’re still, ultimately, not worth it.

Compassion is a better vehicle for change than judgment.

The next time you’re about to make a judgment, try to practice compassion instead.

Let your feeling of needing to judge be a reminder for you to practice compassion. That way, your negativity will be transformed into peace.

Beauty is experienced through a state of peace, never through a state of condemnation. And yes, non-judgment also means to stop complaining.

3. Open Your Heart

If you’re like me and you’re pretty left-brained, you might be thinking, “Okay that’s nice, but how exactly do I open my heart?”

Opening your heart is a matter of accepting yourself and life as it is. It’s a matter of forgiving yourself and others. It’s letting go of all your resistance to the flow of life and the flow of circumstances.

If you want to take action to change something, that’s fine. But it doesn’t make any sense to resist what is already a reality. Surrender to this moment, accept things and people as they are, and your heart will begin to open.

Tips for Daily Living

What all of these things have in common is presence. The more you’re living in the present moment, the more bliss you allow to come into your life. If you’re always living in the future, always seeking something, you’re rejecting what Is – you’re never actually here to experience the miracle of life, right now.

If you can just practice these three things, your life will start to transform dramatically. You’ll begin to tap into your inner integrity and live authentically. You can’t live in acceptance and not be authentic. And if you’re living authentically, you naturally move into a state of bliss. See where this is leading?

The three practices I’ve mentioned above are the primary catalysts for opening yourself up to how wonderful life can be. There are, however, many other practical things you can do that will help you become more aligned with these principles.

Here are a few suggestions:

• Find beauty in the little things. It’s amazing to me how when I stop the incessant mental chatter, and actually just see things, I am blown away by how beautiful they are. The trees swaying, the leaves blowing around on the ground, the waves crashing on the shore. The simplest of things have the most profound beauty. But you can only see them if you’re really there. If your mind is brooding, if you’re off somewhere else, you’ll completely miss them.
• Embrace your artistry. If you think you’re not a creative person, I’m here to respectably tell you – you’re wrong. You couldn’t not create, even if you wanted to. Every time you open your mouth, every story you tell yourself about the drama in your life, is an act of creation. You’re constantly shaping, reinventing, and writing the story of your life. Once you recognize this, it’s much more powerful for you to see yourself as an artist, rather than a non-creative person. So the question is: What story will you create today?
• Live without limits. Some limits are positive and necessary (like speed limits), but a lot of the limits we place on our lives block us from experiencing our full potential. Arbitrary limits, like fearing to reach out to a homeless person or talk to strangers, restrict the flow of love in our lives.
• Realize that beauty can be found in the most mundane. Beauty is not always realized through a life-changing moment or a great epiphany. It’s not always hidden in a rainbow, in an earth-shattering orgasm, or found skydiving at 5,000 feet above the ground. Beauty is often found through looking into a newborn’s eyes, in the blooming of a flower, or in paint peeling off an old fence. It’s often where you least expect it.
• See for the first time. Sometimes we get bogged down in schedules and obligations, and we lose our sense of wonder about the simple joys of life. Just quieting yourself internally and opening yourself up to an experience can allow you to view it again for the very first time. When you’re listening to music, imagine that you might have not been born with the ability to hear. When you reach out to touch someone, think about how many people don’t have use of their limbs. When you observe your surroundings, imagine you’re seeing color for the first time.
• Live intimately with life. The next time you have a drink of coffee or tea, completely take in the smell and the flavor of the beverage. When you breathe, feel the air enter your lungs. When you walk, really feel the ground beneath your feet. The amount of beauty you experience in life is largely related to your level of intimacy with life. If you’re walking around disconnected, you overlook the wealth of artistry that is available to you right now.
• Make your passion a priority. It’s easy to get wrapped up in doing all of the things that we think must get done. Wanting everything to be perfect gets in the way of having time for the things you really care about. While the errands and things on your to-do list might be necessary, it’s important to make the things you love a priority. If you have a hard time with distractions getting in your way, make a specific time during your day that is sacred, where you only do what you really want to do. Maybe it’s an hour of Kung Fu or Yoga in the morning before the rest of the world wakes up. Maybe it’s 30 minutes of Mahjong before you turn in for the night. Whatever it is, you have to make it a priority or it will get lost in the vacuum of the minutiae abyss.
• Focus on the good. The reason still puzzles me, but we humans have a tendency to focus on the negative in events, circumstances, and people. We have a tendency to count our misfortunes and all the things that are lacking before we count our blessings. Make a habit of focusing on all the things you’re grateful for and you will open yourself up to experiencing the beauty of life.
• Give something away. I’ve found that the best way to reconnect with how beautiful life can be is to give something away. It doesn’t have to be anything material. It can be a compliment, a smile, or a positive intention for someone else. Sometimes the greatest gift you can give is sincerely giving your presence.

This list is, by no means, exhaustive. These are just the things that have worked for me. Experiment on your own and take chances. Sometimes a deep breath or a smile at a stranger is all it takes to bring you back into a state of presence.

Closing Thoughts

It’s easy to get motivated to follow or chase a new provocative idea. Seeing the beauty in the “ordinary” sounds quite alluring. But like most things that catch our fleeting interest, our well intended desires get lost in our rush to get things done and keep up with the day to day business of living.

To make our perception of life being amazing a constant perception rather than a transient one, we have to slow down. It’s only through seeing the wisdom of slowing down, breathing and being present that we can realize how ridiculous it is to always be in a hurry. We may think we’re moving quicker, and getting more things done. But in doing so, we miss the point: to enjoy life now.

Only by slowing down and being here now can we make what we’re doing worthwhile. It’s in slowing down that we allow ourselves space to experience life more fully. We often go through life trying to eliminate and fill up space as much as possible in an attempt to “maximize” our time. But in the end, the exact opposite happens.

It’s through space that air fills your lungs. It’s through space that your body moves. It’s through space in the vibration of the air that sound is heard. It’s in the gaps between veins that blood flows. Without the space between these letters, there would be no words for you to read -it would all be incoherent.

In this way, you realize something…

Emptiness truly roars. Silence speaks. Space gives birth to form.

It’s in the gaps that beauty is found.

** Got tips for daily living? Share your thoughts and stories in the comment section. See you there!

About the author: Jonathan Mead is a raw foodist, life coach, and prolific blogger. He is interested in unconventional paths to personal growth and advocates strange things like killing your goals. In his spare time he studies Jeet Kune Do and other ass-kicking strategies. He also wrote a pretty cool book, called Reclaim Your Dreams – An Uncommon Guide to Living on Your Own Terms.

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Other Articles You May Like:

• Living Enlightenment
• Surrender to Pain
• Find Clarity in One Day
• How to Design Your Ideal Life
• Dealing with Difficult People

External Resources:

• Book: Living Enlightenment
• Book: The Power of Now

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Photo: Christopher Daniels

We mentioned the benefits of meditation in the article: Finding Clarity & Inner Stillness.

If meditation is new to you, this article suggests several ways how you can start today. These suggestions are all based on my personal experience testing out various techniques over the years. I have personally found these to be helpful and hope that they can add value to your wellbeing.

1. Zazen or what swamiji calls “Just Sit”. From Zen techniques and also used in transcendental meditation. This is the simplest technique of meditation:

1. Find a comfortable place. Sit with your back straight. It’s important that you are not lying down or slouching as you might fall sleep. Make sure you won’t be disturbed by closing the door and turning off or placing the phone in silent mode.
2. Let your hands rest naturally and comfortably in your lap, or on top of each other.
3. Close your eyes.
4. Start breathing deeply and fully, eventually to a natural breathing rhythm.
5. Focus on your breath and nothing else.
6. When a thought comes, acknowledge the thought, let it pass, and go back to focusing on your breath.

2. “Being with Sound”, An alternative technique to the above:

1. Find really calming music, either light classical or nature music. I recommend Stan Richardson’s Shakuhachi Meditation Music (Click here for digital mp3 purchases).
2. Do A-C from above.
3. Focus on the sound of music and nothing else. Put all your attention on the sound.
4. When a thought comes, acknowledge it, let it pass, and go back to focusing on the sound.

3. “Nithya Dhyan“. This is a beautiful 35 minute guided meditation designed by Nithyananda. After practicing meditation for 10 years, this is the one I follow regularly. It consists of five-part meditation taking seven minutes each. Each step is designed to help you go deeper and calm the noise in your mind. Techniques for each step originate from Tibetan Buddhist, ancient Christianity, Vedanta, Zen Buddhism, and Sufism. You can order the CD for the guided meditation here ($10).

4. Guided Meditations by Deepak Chopra. This is a great guided meditation CD for beginners. Techniques on gratitude and forgiveness are very enlightening. If you are serious about meditating or have experiences with other techniques, these mediations may not feel as effective for you. Give yourself an hour or two to go through this CD the first time, to identify which of the meditations you connect most with. Build a routine around those particular mediations.

5. Local Meditation Groups. I found it helpful, especially when starting out to find a group of people who regularly meditate together. It helps to keep the energy and momentum going for your own practices, but also, I’ve found the energy field to be more intense when I am sharing the experience with others people, both friends and strangers. It’s always so calming to sit together with a group of peaceful people. I practice with a group on Sunday mornings in Mercer Island, 2-3 times a month. For me, leaving the weekly satsang feels like leaving a day at the spa. I feel refreshed and centered. Here are some ideas to find a group near you:

1. Zen meditation group – They usually have group zazen sessions several times a week with sessions between 30-60 minutes long. The hours for these (in my area) tend to be quite early in the morning.
2. Buddhist temples. Try doing a google search for a Buddhist temple in your local area. They typically have group meditation sessions several times a day. Lots of options in terms of time slot. The techniques may vary at different temples, but the underlying purpose is the same. In Seattle, I really liked Sakya Monastery, a Tibetan monastery.
3. Life Bliss Foundation weekly Satsangs. Typically gathering starts with a video on life issues and consciousness, ending with Nithya Dhyan.
4. Eckhart Tolle Silent Groups – Typical format consist of silent meditation for 10-15 minutes at the start and end of a meet-up. Including a 30-60 minute video in between. You can find a list of contacts for your city from eckharttolle.com or check if there’s a local meetup in your area.
5. Meetup.com Groups – Meetup.com is pretty cool for finding local interest groups with in-person gatherings. Try doing a search for the word “meditation” in your area code.

For the wellbeing of your soul, take five minutes to be still, be quiet and let your mind rest. Slowly move up to ten minutes and higher. Create a habit by regularly meditating over several weeks and notice the effect on your life. Cheers to your wellbeing!

* For First time sitters: i know it can be challenging to sit and wait without doing anything at the beginning, but keep going, I promise you will notice the difference. I am very interested in how you feel during and after your first try. Please share your experiences with me. I’d love to hear them.

Other Articles You May Like:

• Find Clarity and Inner Stillness Through Meditation
• 9 Ways of Cultivating Creativity
• 3 Tips to Calm Anxiety
• Dont’ Break Your Back! Tips to Healthy Posture

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Photo: Manuel Galrinho

Periodically, I find myself feeling nervous for no apparent reason, or sometimes for a reason, at which point my mind will create stories to instill fear and worry into my being. My stomach would tighten up and when observed closely, I could feel myself breathing shallowly. It is so easy to to fall into that state once it starts.

Your mind is so powerful. It is so easy to be unconscious. But you know deep down that you are in control and that you can switch out of that state in an instant: the instant you decide to feel joy and refuse to believe in your mind created story, which is no longer serving you.

Three powerful questions to ask your self at any point:

1. Am I breathing?
2. Am I relaxed?
3. Am I moving with grace? (If you are walking)

I picked up this beautifully simple yet effective technique from Dan Millman. The beauty of this technique is that, we can consciously and fully focus on one thing at a time, and so when you have 3 things to focus on, you will be thinking less of your problems, your worries, your stories.

I’ve used this simple technique in my photography work to help my subjects relax, and I’ve suggested it to friends they are buried in worries. It’s very effective.

Suggested book: Way of the Peaceful Warrior, No Ordinary Moments: A peaceful warrior’s guide to daily life

I’ve read both books, and they have brought peace into my life. Peace and better understanding of myself. If you only pick up one copy, get the first one, it was one of the core books that changed me for the better. I hope they will contribute into the wellbeing of your soul as did mine.

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Photo: Randy

Chapter One of “Meditation is for You” by Swamiji Nithyananda says “…without exception, every single goal points to the same thing – a yearning for the state of bliss.” No one can say “I don’t care being happy? Or I don’t want to be in a state of blissfulness.”

However intellectual and sophisticated the term is, and when we express it, what we are all seeking is nothing but achieving peace within ourselves and the feelings of blissfullness. Only the ways we search for it is different. It could be through money, power, or relationships. It could also be through all the comic and tragic dramas of our daily lives. It is the single motivating force of our lives.

“Meditation is nothing but a preparation to rediscover the state of Bliss that is already inside you,” - Swamiji Nithyananda

“Every moment of conscious breath is meditation.” – Eckhart Tolle (“What is Meditation” dvd).

If the above two quotes are tricky for you to personally relate, then try to remember the moments when you’ve experienced extreme beauty. As such moments, we suddenly “become still, wordless and totally aware. And that moment is meditation.”, Nithyananda

Much of what I experienced with feelings of peace, calmness and bliss this past year is attributed to my exploration with meditation techniques. I’ve explored techniques expressed by Eckhart Tolle, Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra, Falun Dafa and Swamiji Nithyananda. I’ve also tried techniques with sound, visualization and have tried both Tibetian and Zen meditation.

The benefits of meditation is well documented, here are some that I’ve experienced personally to achieve focus and concentration:

• Clarity and Decisiveness. With reduced ‘mind clutter’ and confusion, I was able to make quick and firm decisions.
• Slept Less Hours – To achieve a restful sleep, before I use to need more than eight hours of sleep. While I practiced meditation regularly. I would sleep for six hours and it was plenty. Often, I sleep less than that.
• More Energized – With meditation, I felt more energized even though I was sleeping less.
• Saves Time – even though time was used to actually do meditation – but because I was sleeping less, I had more time to do other things. And I was doing them with more focus.
• Blissful and Relaxed- I felt genuinely happier with everything else going on. Sometimes I could feel my face flowing from contentment.
• Centered - I felt more connected with my core and inner being.
• Health – which is the only proven “side effect” of mediation.
• Awareness and Creativity – People tend to be more alert to their environment and become more conscious and aware. Not to mention, you become more pleasant around other people.

The toughest thing for me when I started to meditate was finding time. It is so easy to create excuses to avoid doing things which are good for us (our minds are ‘experts’ at excuses to distract us). We would waste hours browsing on-line or flip on the tv, but we would not spare 5-10 minutes of quality times with ourselves? To let our mind rest? Starting to meditate is tough but I understood that the benefits are paramount to my wellbeing and state of mind.

I started by meditating 10 minutes a day, twice a week, and gradually ended up at a comfortable routine of 30 minutes twice a day. The benefits were enormous and noticeable. And then it happened, after several out of town family visits, I had allowed excuses to kick in and missed one meditation routine. One day then turned into a second day, which eventually turned into a week, and then into several weeks. My carefully formed habit after 3 months of discipline and dedication went down the drain.

What I learned from this is that if we allowed ourselves to make even one excuse (no matter how minute), it’ll be a lot easier to buy into excuses the next time, and it’ll snowball from there. The trick is to form daily routines and do whatever it takes to “protect yourself” by not allowing your habit to be knocked off. Let’s say, you really don’t have 30 minutes to meditate, even if you just sat for 5 minutes, that’ll still train your mind to think that you’re performing your routine. “Doing a little of something is better than a lot of nothing.”

After weeks of being off my meditation routine, I realized how disorganized my thoughts have become. After wasting several hours browsing aimlessly today, I snapped out of my unconsciousness and said, “What was my purpose again?” The lack of awareness, focus and clarity became disturbing to me. I am now ready for change and made it my most important task for the day. Today is day one of my twenty one day challenge – spending a minimum of 10 minutes a day in quiet stillness. Why 21 days? Anything done repeatedly after 21 days will likely be habituated. Are you up for the challenge? Giving yourself the gift of space for 5-10 minutes a day? I’ll be reporting back with my progress.

If you enjoyed this article, please share it on StumbleUpon, vote for it on Digg or bookmark it on del.icio.us. I appreciate your support. :)

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• Meditation 101: How to Start
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